A SUMMING UP.

Manawatu Herald, Volume XXXIV, Issue 1097, 17 September 1912, Page 4

A SUMMING UP.

A thick set, ugly looking fellow was seated in the public park and seemed to be reading some writing on a sheet of paper which he held in his hand.

“ You seem to be much interested in your writing,” I said.

“Yes: I’ve been figuring my accounts with old Alcohol, to see how we stand.” “And he comes out ahead, I suppose ?” “ Every time.” “ How did you come to have dealings with him in the first place ?” “ That’s what I’ve been writing. You see, he promised to make a man of me, but he made me a beast. Then he said he would brace me up, but he made me go staggering around and then threw me into the ditch. He said I must drink to be social. Then he made me quarrel with my best friends and be the laughing stock of my enemies. He gave me a black eye and a broken nose. Then I drank for the good of my health. He ruined the little I had, and left me ‘ sick as a dog.’ ”

“ Of course,” “He said he would warm me up, and I was soon nearly frozen to death. He said he would steady my nerves, but instead he gave me delirium tremens. He said he would give me great strength, and he made me helpless,” “ To be sure.” “ He promised me courage.” “ Then what followed ?” “ Then he made me a coward, for I beat my sick wife and kicked my little sick Jchild. He saidj he would brighten my wits, but instead he made me act like a fool and talk like an idiot. He promised to make a gentleman of me, but he made me a tramp.”—Exchange.