A CLEVER SATIRE.

Manawatu Herald, Volume XXX, Issue 392, 21 March 1908, Page 4

A CLEVER SATIRE.

“Workless Work.” A writer in one of the Wellington dailies, the Dominion, contributes the following delicious little satirical sketch : “Them scientific blokes,” said the small man with whiskers, “is wasting their time- They’re gradgilly inventing things that work without any, works but they’ve been missing the true need of the country. The superfluities what they’re removing are the ones we don’t need removed.” “Wot about wireless telegrams ?” asked the man with the clay pipe. “Well, wot about them ? Wot good are they ? How do they ’elp me and you? W’y don’t they give us wireless wire-netting? And motor cars—they’ve invented ’otseless cabs, but what is more superfluous than the ’orse is the smell. Another bloke’s invented a noiseless, smokeless, flashless gun. And next week another bloke will invent soldierless armies, and things won’t be no better. Why don’t the scientists give us what is reely needed ?” “What things, f’r instance?” asked the man with the clay pipe. “ Well, I can put them on to a few. What about frothless beer ? The man who invents frothless beer will do more for the ’uman race than all the scientific inventors ever known. It’s reely no convenience to ’ave wireless telegrams when ’alf the beer is rumour. And we need speechless politicians bad. When the speechless politician comes along, he gets my vote. But most of all, what’s needed is a workless job. It makes me sick to see the way scientific blokes is wasting their time.”