SHE FORGOT HERSELF.

Manawatu Herald, Volume XXVIII, Issue 3636, 7 April 1906, Page 4

SHE FORGOT HERSELF.

Aunt Thankful Wado Is Suddenly Surprised by a Monkey. Much baa been and written In regard to the ludicrous acts which persons comm:l when suddenly overtaken by a surprising difficulty or by some actual danger. Even the coolest nerves give way av times, and Judgment is raosmiitalUy overbalanced. Aunt TkUikfui Wade was no exception to the general rule. Under ordinary circumstances she Was self possessed and unruffled, but ou mie occasion :-;ue found tbe situ ation so very unexpected that a slight weak -- Wing was certainly to be excused. In her youth she had left her eastern tome and taken up a claim near her brother’s sheep ranch in Montana. laving alone, she had faced unflinchingly much danger and hardship, and enjoyed the reputation of being unusually fearless. A few rods below her house was the little railway station, and one day a bo.-; containing a live monkey was deposited upon th* platform. Through the frail slats hff soon found his way while tbo station m ister was busy, and five minutes later he confronted Aunt Thankful as she chopped kindling Wood before her door. With a shriek of dismay the startled woman ran into the boor-,- .-.ml shut th* door, but the monkey, imdauvited, leaped through the 7 by 5) window loro i ha room. To reach the door a-mln w-Mnua pitting the chattering treat mv was l;apg.t*ibla, and, intending u> bo more discreet then valorous, A unt Thankful ran into the pantry, landing v, il-U both feet in a huro pan of dough upon tfcj From this point sd;a threw tin dishes, plates, knives, wlmtevcr sh« could reach, at her grinning «pp 'ir.-r.t, all of wi-.ieh he deftly r.fiss-. d and j-.>«", : •.-■ i y f;.h .-dr-cri :y. At tins tsyi! ;; in ••• I i.eMnii- i »■> -ci appeared, and making a luswi irma die clothesline r..-cmvd bis express pack which bad gone s-t> ccdiy astray.

“Were you frigK-smd. Auui Thankful?** be asked. “Well,” she said. ;-i-,‘V.-.r,g lon'-ard with tier wonted “i d. :.M hour t-.-r 2. -v dim fur a f.idus i,. c, ;.-.r i don't ko«r ter play hull with m Thtii looking I'.ev, u i. 5 r i , C"voted with tl>?* f.h - ! dou-h, >' ; ei '.' J; *'i r-tv* i swv iu‘ u i jiks, but 1 don’t gire.r.'■ 1 :.:y bieoiiiu wii-b my feet,” The i ds of {.be eh--'; poii.icd to tbs hov.vi.l lb i-.'t it Vhvc/ -v 11 I), in. I. w..s i • :’ir wh*-u graveyards and otl: dd.rs AJ (i -. i .y;,i; :.:r jt.na culling on tbi gii-; Ia fact or in Ih.-viii’.i, gay m- severe, th« If he di-J.tue bvi.night reverse thl personnel of hi -■ >. v:hA:i b,.-’;!e ; • i’ ' bovr w.;s 11 p. m ’1 .!< ■. 'Vi; !■ : - ,-•).■■ ! :• was till) gi The » ••••• uma !-i;u i.-vn in Iking, tab. • tog. tHh.ir.g AM at 0..-v ip- power, hi*, utuiulii . " - -rt- .1 th chick. •Miles.- e. . ,ed, it L!' O’"!.; it," "Yes,'' !.!.>■ mi*! .-,v y-tiy. Then ho twi. .. . ■.• etch. “Why,” lie said. ".i■„> eitcd; is an hotn fast,” Yfie looked at him sihn.oiy, persuasively iipp-.-.'dingly, cloqnnttly, “Hut you f.:c rot, me you?” s'- e.skwl usmu’.lousiy, and ,i ndnnie let; r bv w»w 9f<fi !y du-im: ti.t *door baiund him. A P’.TVOt. Several dr-ys ago « p;ir.'.:;n\.h appeared In ibis column rduting to a parrot name-l Die’.:, owned by !', X. ZkglerolOoliunbus, Pa. Mr. A. lU. Ih.mbo of this city, who 1« utou.'uiil'.'d with Air. ’> <-’<*, ’ n thrt !>h-k eo;e'i;lc;v.-l one «-.f the ler.rl/ and i» perhaps one <.-f the t-.-'y-t ii idi.’.'rr..c birds of Its species iti the world. 1 .■■>;!< l:,\r- • s taltes a band in bouieheid t:cr.. Mr. i-h-mibo

says. “If Mr. Zeigltr's so.; J. as not get np In The •.•'.on.ing ac fee usuri four to go to the ollico, the parrot v.iii say to th 3 girl, ‘Call Clem,’ and t o will inslat on Ins command being obeyttl. L i (-collect ot> onu occasion,” Sir. JiamlH) further :mys, -when the family wen; earnestly discussing ew'-.* local event Dial; br<-l,u in «s follows, ‘Papa, do you love mamma;-' *Ves, of course, I do.’ replied Mr. Zeip.h r. when the parrot blurted out,‘Ob, you old fraud!' ’’

Trifling With the Court

“You were arrested at midnight working on tho safe of the bank with a sledge hammer, nnd yet you protest that you are Innocent,” said Judge Duffy to a l.tirgUn. “I am an innocent man, may it please your honor.” “It would please mu very much to think that you were innocent. VTlmt was your Object, in trying to open the sale f” “I only wanted to open the safe so as to get change for a $6 bill.” “But, you didn’t have nay $0 bill.” "I know that, judge. I expected to find one as soon as I got the safe open.” ‘ ’ * Must Bo Thick. Customer—-This wool is all right, but not thick enough. I want a pair of socks, sir, that will warm an icicle. Clerk—But they are tho heaviest made, ait. Why, they ought to be thick ent-.gk for any man. Customer—Those socks are not for a man, young fellow; they art for my wile to pvtl ou an hour before sha retires for the night. An Easy Argument. “Mother,” said Miss Hilda, “do you think Fritz ought to lounge ia that iui;: J*om* chair?” “Certainly not, Fritz,” said his mother reprovingly, “you might break it.” “If it’s strong enough to hold Hilda and Mr. Helper," argued Fritz as he slowly slid down, “it ought to he strong enough tm hold a little boy Id: - m-"

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