The Tack and the Trousers

Manawatu Herald, 24 May 1898, Page 2

The Tack and the Trousers

JUDGE BACON'S INQUIRIES. At Whitechapel County Court, before Judge Bacon, Benjamin Harris sued Mr E. S. Barnes, manager of the London Theatre of Varieties, Showditch, for 16s, for damages to a pair of trousers. — Defendant did not appear

and was not represented. — Plaintiff explained that one night he went to the London and sat upon a seat in which a tack or something must have been, for on getting up he found the seat of his trousers torn. He was very uncomfortable for the rest of the evening. (Laughter.) — Judge : Yes ? —Plaintiff: Well, it was not nice walking about with a large hole in my trousers. I could not very well wrap a newspaper round me |F 3 LIKE A SCOTCHMAN'S KILT. (Laughter).—Judge : What did you do? — Plaintiff: I saw the assistant manager, and he told me they would inquire into it. Later on I sent the trousers for Mr Barnes to inspect them at his request. (Laughter.) He kept them for 17 days, and as I heard nothing I brought this summons.— Judge : Tell me the history of the trousers.— Plaintiff: History I They havn't any. They're my own.— Judge : When did you buy them ?— Plaintiff: In May. They were part of a blue serge suit. — Judge: And this was in January. Had you worn them every day ?— Plaintif f: They were MY LAST BEST SUIT. —Judge : But May to January ? The seat got thin. (Laughter.) Where was the hole ?■— Plaintiff: In the seat.— Judge: That would be concealed by your coat?— Plaintiff: No.— Judge: Now tell me exactly where it was ?— Plaintiff: I can't.— Judge : Anatomically? (Laughter.)— Plaintiff: It was quite 4 inches long.— Judge : Did you have the same shaped coat as that you are wearing ? — Plaintift : Yes, just like it— Judge : Stand out of the box and let me see your legs.— Plaintiff did as requested. — Judge: Nonsense; those coat tails would CONCBAL THE TEAR. Why did you not have it mended ? — Plaintiff: I am not nsed to having clothes patched.— Judge : I did not say patched. It could have been fine drawn. — Plaintiff: I would not walk about with my trousers fine drawn. Judge : What did the suit cost ?— Plaintiff: 55s.— Judge: Then you are charging more than the original price. Accidents will happen, and no doubt alter this time the part you sat down upon was thinner. People must not take advantage of a disaster to be better off than before. Judgement for ss. You might have had them mended. — Plaintiff: I am not taking advantage; it is the London people who have treated me shabbily. I can't go out with fine-drawn trousers. —Judge: 5s only.