Bon Mots.

Manawatu Herald, 8 May 1897, Page 2

Bon Mots.

Firat Convivial : "Sh two o'clock 1 Wha '11 er missus shay ?" Second Convivial : " Thash all ri'l Shay you bin wi me (hie) I Good news after the last orioket match— Rest for the wicket. • • • Nomenclature — The professional cricketer who makes a " duck's egg " ought sorely to be dabbed a '» quack." Oysters are ' darned.' anomalies — Because they have beards without any chin, and get out of bed to be tucked in. An appropriate quotation to be placed on the urn of the ashes of one cremated—" Well done!" The man who goes out between the acts for a breath of fresh air manages to get a good strong breath. " So you feel you cannot marry him ?" " Yes, lam fully decided." •• Why. don't you like him ?" " Oh, \ I like him well enough, but I can't ' get him to propose." Brobson : " I'm a good deal of a sceptic 1" Craik : " Well, 6ceptioism is easy. All a man ha? to do is to refuse to believe whatever he cannot comprehend, and the bigger fool he is, the grtater sceptic he becomes," Wheel and woe —A Brooklyn inventor has patented a cycle-hearse. ... A person who never earns bis daily bread— The loafer. • ... One who naturally objects to Fire Brigades— Burns, M.P. i Light Literature— Books read in bed by night. . • » The constant meal of Unassorted couples — Tiffin. ... Why ought Li Hung Ohang to make a model theatrical manager ? Because he never gives any orders. Change for a lovereign — The Caar's crown. He : " Would you like to own a - er— a little puppy ?" She ? " Ob, Mr Softly, this is so sudden. • t. He took a house in Hampshire, Why ? Because he said he liked to visit his old Hants.