Clippings from the Comics.

Manawatu Herald, 4 June 1892, Page 3

Clippings from the Comics.

« (From Moonshine.) llight a3 the Banlc— Old Lady (persistently) ; Conductor, I want the Bank! — • 'onductor : All right mum, you've said so 'alf a dozen times a'ready. Dyer want it on mortgage or to buy it outright ? ' (From Judy.) Badinage—" This is wine from the Wood," said the merchant to the connoisseur. " Yeh," replied thft connoisseur, " so I suppose — logwood and chips. I'm thinking.'. (And then blows were struck, and tha colloquy was no longer amicable.) Query — When people " receive a select circle at dinner, 1 ' do they give them a square meal ? A man who spouts his watch clearly proves that time is money. A sweeping Assertion — New brooms sweep clean. A Reflection It is said that there is much more pleasure experienced in giving than receiving. This is doubly true as regards advice and kicks . (From Fun). Dear me ! —Better half ; Georgie, durling, have been 1 quite as dear to you since we married as I was before ? — Remaining Fraction (thinking of his cheque book) ; You have been a precious sight dearer, my dear. The Over- worked Counter-jumper — Assistant in Stores : This, madam, is the best article of the kind on the market. Perhaps you will be so good as to take a seat and read thi3 column of newspaper advertisement referring to it — Customer ; And why should I do that ? — Assistant : Because, madam, it contains everything lam expected to say and if you will kindly read it instead of hearing it, I shall have time to swallow my bit of bread and butter. (From I ick-me up) Technical - Butcher (to boy) : I I say, Tom have you delivered Mr Smith's joint and Mrs .Tone's ribs ? — Boy : Yes, sir. — Butcher : That's right. You'd better now <nt out Mr Robin's liver and run up with Mr James' kidneys, and don't forget to cut off Mrs Brown's skirts an' weigh Mrs O'Malley's pig's fe^t 1 At the Registry Office. — Manager : And why did you leave that place after working so many years there ? — Domestic : Well, it's this way, the missus died last month. - Manager : Well, is the house too lonelyi for you. Domestic : Taint that : but now the missus is dead the master blames everything on me an' I won't be dictated to, I won't.