Page 4 Advertisements Column 5

Manawatu Herald, Volume III, Issue III, 1 September 1891, Page 4

PASQUINADES. Tuts name, which Is given to humourous libels, originated in this way :— At the-stall of a cobbler named Pasquin, at Rome, a I number of idle persons used to assemble to 1 listen to the pleasent. sallies cfPasquin and to relate little anecdotes in their turn, indulge themselves in raillery at the expense ol passers-by. . After the cobbler's death in the sixteenth century, the statue of a gladiatoi, was found near his stall, to which the people gave his name, and on which the wits of his ; time affixed their lampoons upon the state, and ' their satirical effusions on their neighbours, 1 secretly at night. Small poems and writings of a similar kind from this obtained the name of Pasquinades, about the year 1533. j "*:'* ONE FOR HIS NOB. ;<v« • ■_• The lawyer had been badgering the wit- ' ness for some time, and finally asked " Was ! any member of your family ever hanged?". " Yes, sir." , . ■ "Ah, ah! I thought as much. Now, I sir, who was it ?" "Myself." . .'<-«***.««*- --" Yourself ! Do you mean to say you have been hanged, and are alive to tell it ?" "Yes, sir." " Come, now, no trifling, Tell the jury what you were, hanged for, and how you happen to be alive today." " Well, sir, a man was killed, and I was suspected of having committed the crime. A mob took me out, put a rope round my' neck, and just hauled me up to the limb of a tree, when some one in the crowd shouted that the murdered man was a certain lawyer. They couldn't cut mo down quick ; enough, ! I was filled up with the best ■ whisky the place afforded, and given a banquet as the greatest public benefactor in the history oi the town." , , -Ws^ ■ " I "* DANCING. ' At about fourteen years of age the body attains a considerable increase of weight, in consequence of the quick growth that takes place. We often remark that lads and girls of (his age shoot up apace ; and their greater weight is not always attended with a pro.portionale acquisition of strength. They are apt to be rather weak and ungainly in iheir movements; and the weakness often shows itself in the foot, by a yielding of the plantar arch. Moreover, many boys and girls are, at this age, turned out into the world to earn a livelihood, and are obliged to be a good deal upon their feet, and perhaps in addition, have to carry weights. Thus errand boys, butchers' and bakers' boys, and young nursery maids, are frequent sufferers in this way. The constrained positions in dancing, also, if enforced too much or continued too long so as to tire the feet, sometimes lead to the same result. On the other hand, moderate exercise of t)iis kind is calculated to strengthen the foot and also the whole frame, and contributes much to improve the carriage. .&-?.-a % , '.*# ■ -«**JH s . '— '"■' ; A BUCKJUMPER.. ** Mark Twain once bought a horse by auction. "In the afternoon," he "says, " I brought the creature into the plaza, and certain citizens held him by the head, and others by the tail, while I mounted him. As soon as they let go, he placed all his feet in a bunch together, lowered his back, and then suddenly arched it upward, and shot me straight into the air, a matter of three or four feet. I came as straight down again, lit in the saddle, went instantly up again, came down almpst on the high pommel, shot up again, andieame:down'on the horse's neck all in thespace of three or foursecpnds: Then he rose arid stood ■ almost straight up on his hind feet, and I clasping his lean neck. desperately, slid back into. the saddle, and held' on. He came down, and immediately "hoisted his heels into the air; de- ! liverihg a : vicious kick at the sky, arid stood I on his fore feet; and then down he came I once more, and began the original exercise Jof shooting me straight up again. The i third time I went up, I heard a stranger I say. 'Oh, don't he buck, though !' While I 1 was up, somebody struck the horse a sound- | thwack with a leather strap, and when I 1 arrived again ' the horse' was not there." I PEERAGES FOUNDED ON TRADE, t In olden times, the wealth and commerce 1 o I London, conducted a>; it was, by energetic and enterprising men, was a prolific source ut peerages Thus, tho earldom of CornI wallis was founded by Thomas Cornwallis, I Ihe Cheapside merchant ; that of Essex by I William Gapol, tho draper: and that of 1 Craven by William Craven, the merchant 1 tailor. Tho. modern Karl of Warwick is not descended, horn "tho .kingmakers,"- but . from William .Greyille, the woolstapler; whilst the modern Earls of Northumberland find their head, not in the Percjes, but in Hugh Smithson, a respectable London apothecary.;, The founders of the families of Dartmouth, Radnor, Ducie, and Pomfret were respectively , a skinner, a silk manufacturer, a merchant tailor, and a Calais merchant ; whilst, the founder of the peerages of Tankerville, Dormer, and Coventry, were mercers, The ancestors of Earl Romney and Lord Dudley and Ward -were' goldsmiths and jewellers ; and Lord Dacres was a banker in the reign of Charles 1., as Lord Overstone is in that of Queen Victoria. Edward Osborne, the founder of the dukedom of Leeds, was apprenticed to I William Hewet, a rich cloth-worker en j London Bridge, whose only daughter he courageously rescued from drowning by •• leaping into the Thames after her, and I eventually married. Among other peerages 1 founded by trade are those of Fitzwilliam, j Leigh, ,Petre, Cowper, Darnley, Hill,- and J Carririgtoh. '' . ' ■'' v A STRANGE MACHINE. I ' " A boy is a strange machine, isn't he ?" queried the colonel, as he looked out of the office window. 1 " I don't see anything so very strange about that particular boy," replied one of the other loungers, as he sauntered up and saw a boy of ten on the opposite side of the street. ■ " But he's got a jug," persisted the colonel. " Well, what of it ? Can't a boy carry a jug ?" " But he's swinging it round his head !" "Let him swing. You never saw a boy who wouldn't." ; • , : . ' '.', I'll bethe breaks it before he gets to the corner!" exclaimed the* colonel. "Nonsense!" " Bet you five pounds.". , , ■'■' "Done."' ■■'■'' ■' •'" ■■' ' ; *, Half-a-dozen rushed, up. to. watch further proceedings. The boy continued to swing the jug, apparently bent '.uppji performing some particular feat, and just before he reached the corner his hand slipped, and the jug was dashed in pieces. , . , ■'- "ilknewitl 'I knew it!" chuckled the .colonel, as he danced, around. ;...: . „>.. '.. " Drat hira-yhere's your money !" growled the other. •" '. An hour later, after spending the interval in solemn thought, the loser mildly inquired : " Colonel, did you think you had a sure thing on me?" "Certainly. I bought the 1 jug for* that boy, and. gave him a shilling to carry out the programme." " All a woman asks is to be loved." And she can't ask that except during leap year.