WIT AND HUMOR.

Manawatu Herald, Volume II, Issue 16, 17 October 1879, Page 3

WIT AND HUMOR.

1 So, Sad. — "Beautiful, beautiful, silken hair," Philip murmured fondly, toyiug lovingly with one of her nut-brown tresses ; " soft as the plumage of an eagle's wing ; > light us the thistledown that dances on the summer air ; the shimmer of sunset, the glitter of yellow gold, the rich red brown of autumnal rests blend in entrancing beauty in it " And just then it came off in "his hands, and ho forget just what to say next. Xh< re was a moment of profound silence, and then Aurelia took it from him ' and went out of the room with it. When > she came back he was gone. They meet

- now, but they meet as strangers, and the eyes that were wont to beam upon each other with the awakening love light now " glare as though life was an eternal washt day.— Oil City Derrick. "But you know, pa," said a farmer's daughter, when he spoke to her about the t addresses of his neighbour's son, { ' that ma wants me to marry a man of culture." " So • I do, my dear, so Ido ; and there's no bet- '■ ter culture in the country than agricul ture !' ' The following testimonial of a certain patent medicine speaks for itse'f : " Dear Sir, — Two months ago my wife could 1 scarcely speak. She has taken two bottles of your ' Life Eenewer.' and now she can't i speak at all. Please send me two more bottles. I would'nt be without it." ■ Two Californian sharps were placing a game of cards. "It is very singular," observed one, "that I haven't seen a king ' yet." "Not at all," replied the other; '' yon have one in your sleeve and I have the other three in my boot." Tf Noah had foreseen the future, and killed the two mosquitoes which took refuge in the ark, ho would have rendered some of the strongest words in the English language unnecessary. "•What," asked Mr Steele, " is meent by his native air ?" The intelligent boy promptly replied, " The 'air of his own *cad." A man kissed his wife in a London park and was fined twenty-three shillings. He should have kissed her elsewhere, and would have foutd it cheaper to hire a hall. — Washington Capital. A Newark husband who, when he courted his wife, was constantly sighing for the " Sweet by-and-by," doesn't think so much of it now that it is attained. He complains that it has been buy and buy until he is about disgusted.