GREAT EXPECTATIONS.

Marlborough Express, Volume IV, Issue 205, 27 November 1869, Page 5

GREAT EXPECTATIONS.

"Blessed is the man who expecteth little and receiveth less.” Yesterday morning, at 11-4 a.m. by Greymouth Post-office and electric telegraph time, a Government missive was formally delivered by the Post office official (out of uniform) to Mr. Heron, of this town. It is necessary, in order that the startling nature of the communication may be thoroughly understood, that we should be accurate in all the particulars which form the surroundings of the case. The communication we refer to, and we confess we do it with fear and trembling, bore the following superscription : On Her Majesty’s Service. Mr. John Heron, Nonpareil Boarding House, Grey mouth. Post Office. At first Mr. Heron doubted whether such a document as one announced to be " On Her Majesty’s Service” could have been intended for him. His grandfather had been a Sir John Heron, and as he was the sole male issue in the lineal descent, it struck him as possible that he had come into the entail of the title and estates of his venerable grandsire. As might naturally have been expected, Mr. Heron was excited and labored under feelings of great agitation, and it was fortunate for him that at the moment he was within reach of a decanter of Hennessy’s P. 8., which he grasped convulsively in the right hand, and passing it on to his lips felt himself relieved. The dispatch which bore so formidable a superscription was opened, and we publish the contents, which run as follows: "Post-office, Hokitika, "Sept. 29th, 1869. "There is a letter No. 149 at this Office, directed to you, which cannot be forwarded until the postage of ONE PENNY be paid. “ If, therefore, you will desire one of your correspondents to call at this Office and pay the above postage, or if you will transmit to me the amount in New Zealand postage stamps, the Letter will be immediately sent according to the address. "A. Stevenson, Postmaster. " N.B.— When the Letter is enquired for the number should be quoted.” —ln the blast of a trump—in the twinkling of an eye, the vision of his grandpapa’s title and estate vanished from his gaze. He was, or felt he was, a miserable and a blighted being, until Mr. Hennessy informed him, after repeated applications to that distinguished friend and consoler of unfortunate mortals, that he was just as good a man now as he was before. Indeed Mr. Heron began to feel he was a better one altogether. His next thought was how he should raise the penny ; for Mr. Heron confesses he has not seen such a coin of the realm during a period of four years. And Mr. Heron was also equally puzzled as to the "one of your correspondents” mentioned in the royal notice. Mr. Heron says he has not got a correspondent, and does not want-one ; but he will inform us in our next issue what his solicitor has advised him to do in the matter. —Greymouth Star.

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