THE WELLINGTON PUNCH.

Marlborough Express, Volume III, Issue 137, 26 September 1868, Page 6

THE WELLINGTON PUNCH.

We have received a few numbers of this facetious periodical, from which we take the following: Order Paper—House of Representatives.—M r. T. Wacffarlane to ask the Colonial Treasurer whether it is the intention of the Government to act upon the recommendation of the Auckland Reform League. Mr, G. Graham to move, “ That, in deference to the feelings of our Maori fellow subjects, the members of the House shall, on all Thursdays during the session, appear in native full dress.” Subject for a moral picture. —“ Virtue Rewarded.” —-Haughton and O’fNeil cashing their cheques for the Gaol Commission. Wanted, immediately, by the leading journal of the city, an fc'nglish Grammar and Mayor’s Spelling Rook. Coming Events cast their Shadows BEFORE THEIR SUPERINTENDENTS. — Auckland, believing in an old New Zealander , will re-elect King John, although some Northerns, who would raise mountains ol objections, may send to the delta of the Waikato for Colonel Moule, while the people of Marsden and Newton will assuredly advise them to go to Hull, to which Mr. Ticklepenny, of Otahuhu, will say amen. News from the Front. —The Hauhau chief has sent in to Napier, demanding Colonel Whitmore’s head and the right thighbone ot Mr. Colenso for a Waddy- He threatened to burn the town.— The Government telegraphed that they Lave consulted Mr. G e G—h —m, who recommends moderation, i.e., sending the head first, with a complimentary letter, and a dozen cases of brandy. Order paper of House of Representatives.—Sept. ].—Mete Kingi to move, “That Mr. George Graham be elaborately tatooed forthwith, and presented with a handsome mat, a copper-Maori, and a little preserved baby, just to begin with.” Auckland Poll Tax. —The Provincial Government of Auckland has at length hit upon a method of increasing the revenue that is eminently agreeable to all parties. The “ Poll Tax” continues to give the utmost satisfaction, and the collector of this favorite impost is greatly to be envied, it being scarcely necessary for him even to knock at a door in the discharge of his official duties. The entire population of this favoured province usually tender the required half-sovereign with tears in their eyes, occasionally giving the collector “ one for his knob” into the bargain, or insisting upon bis partaking of liquid refreshment in some torm or other, to the extent, sometimes, of a bucketful. In the country districts it frequently occurs that a large carvingknife and pitchfork are at his service, and the words *• Poll-axe” and “ Poll Tax” are so often used in conjunction, a practical demonstration of their respective meaning is often resorted to for the prevention of theoretical error.