IV. THE HARDWARD MAN

Mataura Ensign, Volume 7, Issue 401, 17 October 1884, Page 2

IV. THE HARDWARD MAN

My theme on this occasion is a most unpromising ore. For all the shades of commercial travellers are found in this branch of the profession. They range from the white bell-toppered, neatly cravated, clean shaved, . creaky-booted, swell representative of a swell house, to' I the unkempt, unshaven, unwashed, un mannered Mercury of a slop ironmonger. Between these extremes there are infinite gradations in appearance and manner^

. And the variegations of the one alway strange to sajjr,, correspond to the kalei doscopic appearance of the other. No aproudmariis yourtraTeUer in hardware You will see. him Vonte moment, calm business-like, with the head of a fin from whom he expects an assorted ordei and the next jocularly familiar with i grimy blacksmith to whom, he wants to . <'• sell a -few bars of iron. Or, again, yoi will observe him treating a wheelwrigh to a pint of beer, and then you may con dude' he has sold, or is about to sell, i - £ag of. spokes or by great good luck ai * v axle. $or with the drummer, a drink ii business hours ..always means business either pastj or prospective. j[Our sub ject does not drink for pleasure, ever in the evenings. They are occupied during the evenings ;with recording the result of their day's doings for transmission to head quarters for execution, I'dbn't think I ever saw any but a hardware man occupy a whole evening in writing uphis day's business, and I have often, tried to argue out the cause of this. The brewer's man puts down in his book at the time what ord«rs he gets j the soft goods man has the intervals between customers and the privacy of his sample ..room for such work, but the hardware man sets to work with all the display of carbonised paper and agate stylus, • and impresses every one with the amount ,of trade he. is doing. This must be on account of the interminable number of things he has for sale. When I think of ; the- number of articles these men have to sell, I wonder how so much memory is contained under such unpromising appearances. Bless you, he can furnish you a 1 [house from ceilar to garret. He .can paint it for you— at least he can sell you the materials to, do so ; he will even arrange for the timber for it if you know Hie i fight way to go about it. . Nor is it •alone in land matters he is conversant. . = See him apparently cast high and dry in . a seaport town, . JNTot even there is he at a loss/for'if he can't sell, you a lamp he will some rope or chain. ' He must sell ?ou "some thing; He is* for the variety of is: goods, a veritable Cheap John. If he can t " do" you a line in kettles, he will try you in rope. Rather than go without an order he will sell you a keg of nails, or a barrel of coal tar. And there is none bo apt to pick up an old acquaintance. Like all the fraternity he has a keen recollection of faces, and. will spot a potential \ customer -as ;: a hawk : does* a rabbit — and Triththe game result. By you, of course, I meanithe tradesman. The dignity of a traj- ' Teller would be infringed, upon w«re h$ asked.to sell to a private; person. He i? much above the retail business, thanli yoa, and considers taking orders for half a r dozen plated knives far morel dignified' than selling the game knives one. by one. But .these are. sentiments 1 ' $M' jkeeps, orally at least,, in his, own • bpsbmi -It : would not pay him to give: them audible utterance. I have in myj ©ye one steady old file who has been on' the roadr^aJi his life, one would think i "3£ear after ; year he ; .serenely^ drones^ on. Ea.'c'onversatibn he never gets beyond the Weather,' and wherihe does let offa good thing such as " This ;is weather " he ! smiled all-over and -looks .happy for the I rest of the day. But the old bird> v although he does not break his neck at lightning speed, has -his regular round of customers; r and ■ perhaps does more than Some of the young fellows who look like compressed Qhancellprs of the Exchequer ready to burst into clouds of figures at any moment. The most unpleasant one of the family I ever met was in a railway train. Hs had-. not had a shave for some days. He wore his hat knowingly on one sideband boasted in a dingy shirt and a greasy necktie. -Yet, withal, there was a rakish. half-confident half-diffident look about him which reminded me of "Dick Swiveller. That man should never liave been allowed on the road. But as I learned, afterwards he was travelling in a special line,: and was not recognised by the fraternity. It is somewhat singular that there is , a peculiarity about each class of travellers which enables the experienced to detect them at once. So there is about mechanics. I have not yet formulated my reasons for such conclusions, but I have almost invariably found them , correct. It would be impossible to mistake a hardware traveller for anything else. He is no " son of an Irish lord " travelling incog. One would never think he was travelling for pleasure. As to his manners and customs there, is nothing uncommon about them. Sometimes he is a gentleman, sometimes not, according to his grade in his business. The best of them only are grammatical in their speech, but of course as they do not sell grammar it would be|unreasonable to expect them to keep a very large stock of it on hand. For the rest, they are mostly jolly' fellows and share the generous feelings for each other which seem the natural result of such a life. And here I leave hiis, wishing him luck on his not ambrosial way.