MISCELLANEOUS EXTRACTS.

Mataura Ensign, Volume 7, Issue 380, 5 August 1884, Page 5

MISCELLANEOUS EXTRACTS.

She'd seen 'em. " What is a cyclops ?" asked Mrs Jones of her husband, last evening, just as she had laid down the family cyclopedia and taken up the paper to peruse. " A cyclbps," said Mr Jones, "is a being with only one eye, dear." " Well," resumed his wife, "if the < thing hainV. got more than one idea, it ain't worth making, much fuss about. I know a good many' of* 'cm — folks what ainfc blest with but' one idea." An army on skates. , :, , f : =f> Perhaps the most curious battalion in any army is the Norwegian corps of skater?; ' The corps is composed of picked men, at-tred with rifles, which they use with great precision. Xtr§.'*sk.iiteg.:use3 are admirably adapted for travelling over rough and broken ice and - frozen snow, being six inches broad and between nine and ten inches long, The soldiers cari.jbe pianoguvgred upon ice or over i the snow-fielda/with'a rapidity eqnal to that of the best trained cavalry. As an instance of -Be speed they can go, it is stated that a messenger attached to th. corps has accomplished 120 miles in eighteen hoiirS'and a half over mountainous country. . , ■> )• -*h Sitting Cross-Legged. )f { M. Delannay, of Paris, has been .making .xtensive in V-stigationsLuport the -subject of postures in sitting aSregards the extremities. He finds that the Chinese cross the lef t arm over the right, while Europeans cross the right over the left. . Robust- children -cross ,- the righ .••'over the left. ".Those Tpannot work or are idiotic dq the 'contrary. 7 A great many women cross the left leg over the right. Among opera dancers some always 'cross the right leg over the left, but no one crosses the left ovei* the right habitually.- Infants under 3. years cross the left arm - over the right, and when older reverse the position. The Professor -finds that men generally cross the right leg over the left, and cites the' statements of tailors that trousers are always ' worn ! more oh the left side, which bears most of ' the weight. Many conclusions are drawn" %om these facts, the most important one being that the left brain, develops before the right, but finally the right predominates. The Symbol of ; a System that Produced Them. An intelligent writer, of the Salt Lake City, Mrs Pa.ddp.ck, in a letter tells this story: " A' few years' ago an educated young jour--1 nsdist came to Salt Lake City from Europe, with his, young, wife. Both became sincere believers, in Mormonism. Then /strong^pressure, was brought to bear by 'the .priesthood upon the husband to' force him; ihto. f polygamy. The wife, finding . .opposition' in vain, at last gave her nominal ' consent;! A second bride was brought into the house. In a short .imet_uV .first wife be'cUme (another but the infant never cried aloud. It came voiceless into the world. But it wept in secret all the time. Sleeping or waking the tears flowed from its closed eyes, and in a few weeks it died. The mother said it died of a broken heart. Every day of its life it , shed the tears that its another had repressed before its birth.' ' Its ' weeping face is the symbol of the face of Utah. 'A territory of precious minerals and wealth of soil, with intoxicating air and blue sky, but filled with silent woe." ■•'••...> :.*... '■' . How* ,; he came Oiit. [" I understand," said, Charlie'to Fred,"that you went up last night to see your girl's father and asked him to.adoptyou as a son-in-law. How is it?" '-' " Yes, I meandered up that way about the 'time that twilight and ; daylight get mixed up so you can't tell a.in. fromp.'mV' . " Did you see the old gentleman ?,' "Of course I. did. 1 That's what I went for." .■:■•.' ; " And did you make the proposition pre. viously cited ?'•'. \7- /■'■' '' I '"% J'l.did,>,ior,a.fac-.'l: 7 7/73 '"•^Well, how' did you coM s icmt J** l^^ 7 i , i-.\ :. ."..Darfiedif Ifcnowi. The old man Vcaughti m Vestig_;tipn'as '^o I tfie"''-xafc-f'-loca_% of ''my „r* egress. Good_nd_hm^ril'.ge i yoU^lat6K t !Ehere : '7 comes thei t>lti f^llovr thfe : f Way -now-. % -2« £ '■'■"' ; ' J %£at^e'Sali'--' ; ' f 3 Oh, yes, 111 "tell you the story-f-r .- :•"*.-' *' ' The very words- that, werei isaidj •*.;.-■■ : * Tou see'^the.supperwas cooking,) .»• . ■.-., a ;.And I was slicing the breads. *•;-,•/ j And Richard came into the /pantry, : | His face was exceedingly red.' .-: -•■ ■.■- He opened his half-shut fingers,* ; ; '77' . .And gave me. a glimpse of a #ng; And, then— oh; yes, 1 remember,' , - . The kettle began to sing; ' *-'- '"-' -•'•' And' Fanny came in with her baby— The c^nningest bit of a thing. And the biscuit were out in a minute Well, what came next? Let me see-r-Oh ! Fanny was there witb the baby, -.-; And we ali sat 'down to tea, . ■ -.-•• And grandma looked ' over her glasses - '> So queer at Kicb-id an.i me. ■ . ■ But it wasn't till after milking . That he said what he had to say, How was it ? Oh ! Fanny had taken : The baby and gone away — The funniest rogue of a fellow — He had a new tooth that day. We were standing under the pltim tree, L And Richard said something low, But I was tired andflnstered, And trembled, I almost know ; For old Red is the" hardest of milkers,, , , And Brindle's so horribly slow. And that— let me sse — where was: If Oh ! the stars pre**- thick overhead,* And we two stood tinder the plum tree Till the chickens flew up tobedr- . Well,. he loved me, and we're to be married— And that is — about what he s'iid. Eminent Mea ' s D^^^ of Mozart's sad notion that 'the requiem he had undertaken to write for his mysterious customer would be hi_f,ow%,.,<|path chant proved as prophetic .as serious .assent to the jocular suggestjoft-ithat when " the end of all things "was complete , there would be an end to the painter. Fechter's intuition was not at fault when ifc made him urge the sculptors,,; taking his instructions respecting his last festiifg-place, to set to work at once, as , there /was no time to lose ; when the tomb' was ready for the tenant the tenant was ready. for the tomb. ' " ■' -'* Tom Sheridan, bidding Angelo gi-od-bye with the reward, " I have twenty months to live," gauged the term to of his existence to a nicety. Awakened from a sick man's slumber by the baying of hounds, and the- uproar attending the pulling down of a stag in a neighbor's garden, sport-hating Millet exclaimed, "It is an omen 1" and in a few days took leave of pencil and paper for ever. Not long before his fatal illness," Prince Albert said to the Queen, "I do not clin«* to life. You do, but I set no store by it.° If I knew that those I loved were weil cared for, I should be quite ready^todieto-morrow. I am sure, if I' had a severe illness, I should give upjit once, I should, not struggle [for A Noble Art of Self-defence. "Do you think it would be .vrong "for me to learn the noblo art of self-defence/" a religiously inclined Somerville yocth ' inquired of his pastor. " Certainly not," answered the minister • '< I learned it in my youth myself, and I have found it of great value during my life " '• Indeed, sir. Did you learn the old Knelish system, or Sullivan's system ?" " Neither. I learned Solomon's system " " Solomon's system ?" " Yes. You will find it laid down in the first verse of the fifteenth 1 chapter' of Pro verbs :« A soft answer turneth away wrath ' It wthe best system of self-defence of w&cil -- 1 have any knowledge," : . -^