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Marlborough Daily Times, Volume II, Issue 138, 16 July 1880, Page 1 (Supplement)

In the case of a man who died from having had all is teeth knocked out with a hatchet an Alabama Jury rendered a verdict of ‘Deathfrom ax-dental causes.’

Have courage to review your own conduct to condemn it when you detect faults, to amend it to the best of your ability, to make good resolves for future guidance, and to keep them. The} r were fishing off the coast when the fair one of the party pointed to a sail in the distance, and asked, ‘George, what kind of vessel is that?’—He leaned over, stole a kiss from her lips, and calinl}’, * That’s a fishing smack.’ •

Woman. ‘Woman, ’an imaginative writer says, ‘ is compounded of three articles, sugar, tincture of arnica, and soft soap—sugar, because of the sweetness apparent iu all women, though it lias become acidulated to domestic vinegar; arnica, because of the healing and soothing women afield to men after the trial 4 of life ; and soft soap for reasons too obvioujj, to need specification. ’ f

Said a distinguished politician to his son * ‘ Look at me! I began as an aldeqman—aud here lam at the ton of the tree. And what is my reward ?’ Why, when I die, my son will be tVe greatest rascal in'the city.’— To this the young Hopeful replied. ‘Yea, dad, when 3*oll die—but not till then.’

A Young Woman in the country, incensed at an egotistical young mau from town, : said. ‘Tf the butcher, down in the village i could buy you at the price your acquaint- j ances hold you at, and sell you at your j own estimate of yourself, he could retire from business on what he’d make oa that single speculation ia Yeal ’ !