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Marlborough Daily Times, Volume II, Issue 138, 16 July 1880, Page 1 (Supplement)

The latest French definition of a lover is a man with whom one woman deceh es another, with whom she deceives herself and whom she deceives.

A father who grew impatient at the prolonged stay < f an ardent admirer of his daughter, entered the room and invited the young man to stay to breakfast. The young man declined the invitation.

A sharp little girl got out of patience with her bashful lover’s backwardness, and so she brought matters to a favourable climax by saying to him, ‘I really believe you are afraid to ask me to marry you, for you know I would say yes. ’ A Source of Unhappines.—What numberless sources of unhappiness bestrew the female pathway ! When a young lady goes to an entertainment and sees a lady-friond accompanied by, a gentleman she does not know, she does not enjoy the performance a bit, as she is occupied the whole evening in wondering who the stranger is.

Rectifying a Mistake.—A family found a good thickness of cream on some milk that had been standing over night, aud when the milkman made his usual call the pleased servant exhibited the cream, winked wisely and solemnly, scratched his head, and replied, ‘Well, I don’t knowhvhat’s the matter with ’it, but you can throw it out, and I’ll give you a fresh pint in its place,'