THE MATAMATA RECORD, MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 24, 1923. Brief Mention of Happenings in Matamata and Vicinity.

Matamata Record, Volume VI, Issue 474, 24 September 1923, Page 2

THE MATAMATA RECORD,

MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 24, 1923. Brief Mention of Happenings in Matamata and Vicinity.

The Only Paper Published in the Matamata County.

The Masterton Dairy Co. has refused oifers from Is Gikl to Is 62(1 for its make of butter for three months.

i The Maorilahd Worker is responsible for the statement that " members of the Wilford group have secured o controlling interest in the New Zealand company owning the newspaper called Truth."

A newly-appointed herd-tester in the Wairarapa, conversing with an Age representative, stated that by testing it had been proved that a herd of 40 cows, after 10 had been culled out, had returned more money than the original 50, this being due to the good producers getting the benefit of the extra feed.

Doris was very nervous and had a horror of going to sleep in the.dark Her mother, anxious ,to overcome this weakness, said as she was leaving her: " Remember, darling, that an angel will still be with you when I take the candle away." " Mummy," pleaded a small voice, " I'd much r'ather you took the angel arid left the candle."

Recently a high official of the Postal Department made a public pronouncement re the difficulties the postal service was up . against through correspondents insufficiently addressing . letters. By . a recent mail a Te Awamutu resident obtained a letter from England addressed " Awa, Auckland, N.Z." The vigilant Auckland officials superscribed it, "Try Te Awamutu," and they were right the very first time.

An amusing story is. told in connection with the recent earthquake (says the Examiner). A Woodville resident was telephoning to Danne virke when the shake started, and said: " Wait a minute, here's an earthquake." When it was over the Dannevirk'e man stated that they had not had it, and they both agreed it was rather strange, but it was not Jong before he yelled: "Here it is" —and it was.

If you do any "of these things listed; by a theatre" manager you are a movie, pest and an annoyance to all around you:—People who read titles out. aloud; people who eat sweets out of crackling paper bags; crying babies; people who hold up the line at the ticket window to count their change; people who " horn in " ahead of their turn in line; people who kick at the back of the seat ahead of them; people who "have seen the picture before " and tell about it.

The Mayor of Cambridge;indulged in a little plain speaking to coun'cil lors at a recent meeting?* of" the Borough Council, says the Independent In the course of a discussion the Mayor stated that there were far to many council meetings held at the street corners, where matters that had come before the council in committee were discussed before they had actually been before open council. Mr. Priestley strongly condemned the continuance of this sort of thine:, which he said caused much trouble and unpleasantness.

When a visitor from outside invades the King Country territory it is a usual thing for, tales of sly-grog soiling to be told (remarks the Wanganui Chronicle). A Wanganui-ite who was there last week heard the latest. A Maori conceived the brilliant idea of getting his grog over the border in a barrel labelled "Motor Oil A." Unfortunately for the would-be reveller his barrel became confused at the railway siding with a genuine barrel of oil. When the native discovered the mistake he adopted Sher- - lock Holmes methods to retrieve his loss and was successful in tracing his grog to the garage of a well-to-do farmer. On inquiry from one of the womenfolk he learned that the owner was away. " Well, where te car? "ho asked. "The car? It's at Ohakune being repaired. Mr. ran it over the bank last night" "Py golly ! No wonder. Te damn thing must ha' bin stunned!" .

A couple of weeks ago (relates-an exchange) two journalists and two school teachers, who have been tour ing New Zealand, paid a visit to the National Park. They were evidently under the impression that there was first-class accommodation un in 'those high altitudes, as included in their luggage were evening dresses and similar finery. On reaching the park —th«sy walked' the latter portion of the journey after being' motored from Waimarino—they found nothing more inviting than an empty hut, and not even wood for the fire. The tourists settled down to spend a miserable night, and their peace of mind was not improved when they found on the ' wall a motivation that the habitation was the famous haunted whare, where, j»*cording to legend, the sweetfaced Maori woman comes at the dark hour before dawn. When daylight came the tourists started to beat a hasty retreat, Th?ir next adventure was to meet some strange-look-ing men whom they later discovered were prisoners on their way to work i on th n n«w rofld that is being built through the park. Mr. H. A. Bagley, Opt.D., sight s-oecis'i'-tt; will vi<ut Matamata next:, Thur«<!:<v. Sen'eimV-r 27. and at Brinrile's building .Vupstairs); Eyestrain is a common" cause'' of he."dach»s. nervous disorders, sleenlessness and fatigue, etc. Glasses in time save eves. Appointments may be made through Mr. Corbett, chemist.* Before purchasing belting consult us. W* hive a big consignment just to ha»vl direct from the manufacturers. Prices are right. D. McL. Wallace, Ltd.* For Bronehial Coofha, Uke Woods' Great Peppermint Cure, ■

Attention is directed to important meetings of dairy farmers which will be held throughout the district next week in connection with the forthcoming referendum upon the Dairy Produce Export Control Bill.

Buyers of dairy produce are operating in the Dannevirke district. It is said that no less than 14 of them are dodging one another round the different factories, who are holding off in the hope of securing better offers than the best offered by the 14 buyers. For cheese the offers vary from 83d to 9d per pound and for butter Is sd.

It is definitely stated that the Paeroa Brewery Co. will open a wholesale depot at Matamata next week. There was a doubt as to whether this was legal but apparently the directors of the company are - quite satisfied on the point. 'Hie circumstances, we understand, are possible through the company's brewery being in a nolicense area. In a, return presented to Parliament it was shown tliat there are 554 owners.of estates valued at between £20,000 - and- £3O-,000, ,271 between £30,000 ■ and ' £40,000, 08 between £40,000 and £50,000, 53 between £50,000 and £60,000, 104 between £60,000 and over. -There was granted by way of rebate under the provision of the I'and Tax Amendment Act, 1921, £146.294 to persons and firms and £30.588 ro companies. Where are the millionaire landowners? A non-resident of Matamata was found in an alleged drunken condition in Tower road on Thursday evening. Constable Hceps was sent for and on proceeding to the scene was. greeted by the stranger with an apparently almost-emptied methylated spirit bottle and some language which, it is stated, also contained a certain amount of spirit. He was arrested by the constable and lodged in the lockup, where it was found necessary to procure medical attention for the accused. This constitutes the first arrest on the streets of Matamata within recollection. It has been reported that in Hamilton there is a boy of about 13 years of age who is; adept at chess playing. One or two Morrinsville chess .enthusiasts declare that they have met more than their canal in Cecil Pickering, a Morrinsville boy of only 12 years of age, and it is confidently asserted by several who have played with him that he should prove equal or batter than the Hamilton boy. One of the gentlemen concerned is prepared to be.ir ,the expense',of matching the Morrinsville boy again'st any .others the neighbouring town care to nut forward. Man wakes up in the morning, after sleeping under an advertised blanket, on an advertised mattress; takes off advertised pyjamas; takes a shower in an advertised tub; shaves with an advertised razor; washes with advertised soap; powders his face with an ■advertised powder;' dons advertised underwear, hose, shirt, collar, shoes, jtsuit, handkerchief; sits down to breakfast of an advertised ..cereal; reads the advertisements in his local ipaper; drinks advertised coffee;. puts on an advertised hat; lights an.adyertised cigar; rides to his office in. an ;' jdvertised car, on advertised tyres; .where he refuse's to" advertise on the ground ; that' advertising does not pay. 1 The opinion has been' expressed; that the letter "" e-*' is the most <unfortu-., nate letter in the English alphabet," because it is always-out of cash, for*-* *ver in debt? never out of danger, and in;hell all the time. It is fortunate that it is never in war and al-ways-in peace; it'is the beginning -of existence, thp commencement of ease,, and the end of Without it there would be no meat, no life, and no heaven. It is the centre of honesty, and makes love.perfect. - It.,also starts off in error, and printing, publishingr typography, and lithography, can get along without-out, although it is necessary in electrotyping, engraving, and typefounding. It is the beginning and end of editorial existence.—Type.

If beer is allowed to live till it is 21 years old, is it permissible to speak of it as having come of age, or having reached its majority? The famous "King's Ale," brewed by King Edward at Burton, came of age three months atro. But it is still getting better and better every year, so it is said, and is, expected to reach its full maturity in another 20 or 30 years' time. Even if it were to live to be 50, however, it has already been beaten for lengevity by the " Ratcliff Ale," samples of which are still in the possession of Messrs. Bass. It was brewed in December, 18G9—54 years ago—to commemorate the birth of th° first son born to the' late Mr. Richard Ratcliff, one of the partners in the famous brewing firm. .

Some, slight consternation was caused in a Matamata boardinghouse in-the very small hours of one morning last, week when what at- that usually quiet time sounded like a terrific explosion took place. It appears that two of'the boarders' sleep in an, annexe outside and some irresponsible practical joker rudely broke their slumbers by hurling a 7 Chinese bomb through the open wintfow.' The pair in question not only got the fright of their lives but the rest of the house was roused up in alarm and night attire at the sound of the disturbance. They were not able to 'find the perpetrator of the alleged jest, however, for at the sight of so many in white arrayed he deemed discretion better than valour and made his getaway under cover of the friendly darkness.