THE DREAM OF JOHN BRIGHT.

Lyttelton Times, Volume XI, Issue 674, 23 April 1859, Page 5

THE DREAM OF JOHN BRIGHT.

(From ' Punch,' January 8.) 'Twas on the closing of the year, About the time of Yule, Came four-and-twenty loose M.P.'s Tale-telling out of school; There were some that raved, and some behaved Like old Lords of Misrule. They talked about with reckless minds; Reformers thick and thin: All old-world caution laughed to scorn, Called moderation sin: Bade folks kick British notions out, And Yankee ones take in. Such gen'ral shying ne'er was seen , Since kiiock-me-downs began; ' ; They turned to mirth, rank, wealth and worth, • As but mob-flatterers can: : '; -But the leader sat apart'from all, A melancholy man! His broad-brim off:., his vest apart : No tie his neck to squeeze: ;

In neglige unquakerlike, And with spirit ill at ease. . As a tar who finds he's raised a gale By whistling for a breeze. Tired of distorting facts, to fig--ures tired of playing cook, He fumed, he fretted: springing up, Some moody turns he took. When lo! he saw a small M.P., • That pored upon a book! ' "In what book read you, thus, intent? Progress's Tale, by Philp in?-.-*... .-.-■ —Progress? Oh, happy they,-their faith. Who on the word can still pin!— *' The small M.P. looked up, and said, " I'm reading Johnny Gilpin." , The leader took six hasty strides— (To such strides"he, was prone): Six hasty strides beyOrid the place, . Six hastier back anon: . And down he sat by the small M.P, And talked to him of John. And how the tale that Cowper wrote, And all the world doth know, Deep allegoric meaning veils, . Its mask of mirth below; How few that start to ride can tell How far they'll have to go. And how John Gilpin is a type '.''- Of Agitator kind; The calendar's hot, hard-mouthed horse, : A hobby;of-the mind; r. -„.,• Whereon who mounts by no means can Pull up when so inclined. And he told of Revolutions wild, "'■'■■ And things'that then befall;. How thereare times when public men,. Turn Johnny Gilpins all: To whom, at speed, mobs shout "well done," As loud, as they can bawl. While they have much ado to hold The saddles they bestride, Nor more control the steed they sit, Than vessels do the tide: It is the team has bolted: they Are passengers inside. "And well," quoth he, " I know for truth Their pangs must be extreme ;-— Stokers, who find they've stopped the valves, When they wish to shut off steam— For why—methought I vy as such an one But last night—in a dream." "A Brummagem Cromwell I would be, And to the Speaker's face As a fool's cap treat his reverend wig, As a bauble mock his mace. Yes: now, said I, the old House shall die, And a new House-take its place. "Two monster meetings at Birmingham, At Manchester but one; A talk at Glasgow and Edinburgh, And then the deed was done: There lay the old Parliament defunct, And I was the great gun! " There lay the old Parliament defunct, And I had drawn the >abill! But oh! the pricks and qualms I felt When I had wrought my will: There seemed a life in the Old House, Not even I could kill. " I thought of all my triumphs there, In corn-law fights of fame; Ten thousand thousand memories Seemed to be crying f shame!:' I took my Cocker in my hand, But the figures went and came. "And now for my new Commons' House The writs went through the land; Which I had parcelled out in squares, Symmetrically planned: With household suffrage .and ballot-box, - That members might command. " The new House met; a motley set; ' The place I hardly knew; What with Coxes multiplied by ten, And the Pope's brass band by two. The old House had few working men, But none at all had the new! "Yet where the old House .passed one bill, The newone, it passed three; For as all were of one way of thinking, They didn't disagree. The know-nothings and the have-nothings Worked well in companie. "And first they voted each Member Should have his pound a-day; And then they voted the National Debt Should be sponged right clean away; And they organised labom; on the plan Of ' no work and good pay.' " I urged them to clap on the break; I swam against the stream;

But was called a bloated aristocrat, : Puffed out by bloom and steam. My good M.P., remember, this . Was nothing but a dream. " They voted the peoples of the earth What the French call sol idaire; Went in for oppressed nationalities, Big or little, dark or fair; I called for diminished armaments, But I found myself nowhere. " The Income-tax they doubled soon In country and in town. Why should not the rich, they asked, pay up A shilling in the crown ? I quoted M'Culloeh and Adam Smith, But was instantly coughed down. "The old Trade-Combinations Next reared their heads and thrived j The statutes ■' against Forestallers And Kegraters'were revived: I saw Protection's old flag brought out, And for shame 'neath the bench dived I " O Lord! to think of their wild schemes And mine so,right and fair ; — Retrenchment, non-intervention, Free-Trade, and Laissezfaire! _ Where are my hopes from the House 1 had made? And Echo answered, ' Where ?' " I had a power I could not guide ; . Like Gilpin, of whom you read ; I meant to stop at Birmingham, And got Lord knows where instead, And the more I pulled at my horse's roms, The straighter he kept his head. •' I, could'nt appeal tp knowledge ; Household suffrage'drown'd her cry j I could'nt appeal to Wealth or-Worth, Or Rank, their power to try ; The ballot to all such influences Had given the go-by. " Then down I cast me on my face. And did my best to weep ; And I wished the Old House alive again And the New One fathoms deep; But'tis easier to,lose the road, Then back to it to creep 1 " Oh, me—that frothy, fussy Housa Besets me now awakeCoxes and Williamses by scores, With each a speech to make; And Ernest Joneses at intervals, The monotone to break! " And still no peace to my tortured soul Will night or day allow; That dreadful New House haunts my life— ' I'm sitting in it Now!" The scared M.P.- looked up and saw Huge drops upon his brow. That very night when his platitudes That M.P.'s audience hissed, A stout Quaker took train for Rochdale, And resumed the spinning of twist. And if John Bright bring in no bill, I can't say'twill be missed.

* See " Phijp's History of Progress;" very nice reading for M.P.'s of an inquiring turn of mind.— Ed.