LAUGH IT OFF

Lake County Mail, Issue 31, 24 December 1947, Page 5

LAUGH IT OFF

Little Girl (seeing parsnips for the first time); Daddy, how ill these carrots look. « • * “ Pin going to speak my mind! ” she said. “Ah! Silence at last!” # * * “ Have you a good laundress?” “An excellent one. She brought me seven more collars than I sent her and all my size.” * * * “ Carlson says his motor boat is the best on the earth.” “ Yes, that may be —but on the water it is not much to speak about.” # * # Teacher: A river has a mouth, yes, now name some part of a mountain. “ Please miss, ears.” “ Ears? What do you mean?” “ Please, miss, mountaineers. ” * * * Composer: What shall I call my new tune? Critic: I would suggest, “ The Forger’s Wallet.” Composer: Why? Critic:'-It’s so full of false notes! * * * Bill bought a tandem to take his girl on a cycling tour, and they struck off one warm,’ sunny day. All went well until they had covered the first 50 miles, when Bill dropped off his machine, puffing and panting. He was wiping the sweat from his brow when suddenly he saw his sweetheart examining her pedals. “ What’s the matter?” asked Bill. “Nothing, dear,” - she replied. “I ■was just wondering what these things were for. • # '* “Julia, do you know what love is?” The young man put the question in an intense voice. “Yes,” replied the girl firmly. “But do you really know?” he asked again. “ Have you ever been the object of a love as undying as the sun, as all-pervading as the air, as wonderful and sparkling as the stars? Have you ever loved and been loved like that, Julia?” In the agony of suspense he waited for her reply. “ Have I? ” she murmured. “If you will come up into our boxroom, I can show you a trunk full of letters and three albums full of photographs. And in my jewel-case are seven engagement rings! ”