Tales Told by an Early Pioneer

Lake County Mail, Issue 13, 20 August 1947, Page 12

Tales Told by an Early Pioneer

One day a boat arrived at the head of the lake, and a disreputable-looking man landed therefrom, and coming up to our hut, told me that Mr Eees had sent him to cook for me. I said I did not require a cook, and that he could clear out of the hut, as fast as he liked. But instead of liis doing so, ho dashed ,into a back room which had been built for the purpose of keeping stores, and began filling his pockets with tea, raisins, etc. I grasped him by the collar of his coat and rushed him outside the door, when he immediately dodged round the hut, and at that moment Reid, the shepherd, stepped inside to get someone to help him pull up the gallows a sheep which he had ,iust killed. I went out with him, and to our utter amazement found no carcase there. We hunted high and low, at last, in a hollow of the ground some distance away, we found the would-be cook covering up the carcase of the sheep with grass. Reid polled him to his feet, and asked him in forcible language what he was doing. “ Whist,” said he, “ I am saying my prayers.” “ I’ll give you something to pray for,” said Reid, flinging him full length on the top of the spear grass tussock, which elicited from the prayerful one howls of anguish, and from the mountains around us some weird fantastic echoes. Such an annoyance was this man about the place with his theiving proclivities that I tied him up in a canvas boat which was on the,premises, and sent him off by next opportunity, with the instructions to leave him on one of the islands. This was done, but two sawyers, who were living there, found him such an intolerable nuisance that they packed him off to Queenstown by the first boat, and two days afterwards he was locked up on a charge of theft. The inimitable Thatcher was at that time giving concerts in Harry Redfern’s Theatre Royal, and amongst his songs on local subjects, none was accorded a more enthusiastic reception from the digging audience than the one which referred to the arrest of my would-be cook, generally known as Cockatoo Jack, the words of which I give below to the best of my recollection :

COCKATOO JACK Tim. ugh the camp t’other day I was taking my way, “ Here’s a new subject Thatcher,” some digger did say, So i picked up my ears and I opened my eyes, And 1 saw a sight which tilled me with surprise. Four men were conveying a body along; “How nicely they manage things here,” I said, “ No hospital here where the sick may repair, But alone and unfriendly they die in despair. “Another poor follow found dead here,” thinks I, “ Who has left friends and home ’midst these mountains to die.” 1 felt sad at heart as I looked on the dead; Alas! ye poor diggers who fortunes pursue, What eareth the New Zealand (lovern- ■ mcnt for you? ” So- I mournfully went up and mixed with the throng, To see who it was they were taking along. But the man wasn’t dead, for lie opened his eyes; “ Don’t take him so roughly,” T said, in surprise. I addressed the detective, my brows too I knit, But Jack took it easy and tried to explain, How he thought he was walking in Petticoat Lane — f couldn’t help laughing, the joke was ! so good, But it had avail when he came -beV fore Wood. • And I said, “I’m afraid the poor man’s

in a fit.” But Callan then winked- and looked slyly at me; “ I think we’ve got something to fit him,” says he. And they let him come down such a bump on his back, And says he, “ Don’t you know him? Why, it’s Cockatoo Jack! ” “ Near the ‘All Nations,’ ” says Callan, “as-1 went bobbing around, This cove in the act prigging wipes • there I found, I collared my nabs to fetch him to camp, But Jack wouldn’t go, tho’ but it’s a short tramp. Well, I got assistance, he’d not stir a peg— It takes four to carry him, one to each leg, One man to his coconut, one to his back ; And we sire going to chain up this Cockatoo Jack.” Now a sheenie was there with the wipes in his hand—- “ Beside see ‘All Nations’,” said he, “I was stand, Verc I sells pocket books, thread, needles, and rings, Gold pags and all manner of very nice „ tings. Veil, as I vas selling mine goods at mine stall, And I wasn’t finking of nosing-at all, Yen vonce•that I happened to turn round mine back, So help mine Got, I was robbed by this Cockatoo Jack.” He’s gone down with the escort, the lucky dog. At prigging they tell me he goes the whole hog, But punishing him ain’t of any avail, Bor Jack is too partial to being in gaol. Now, when Jack was lugged off and shoved into the camp, The poor Sheen ie’s spirits received such a damp, For they told him that down into the town he- must go. And prosecute Jack he must travel below. “Mine Got,” said the Sheenie, “Vat, go down to town; Vy, the handkerchief vas not vorth half-a-crown, Dirty pounds it will cost me before I get back —- Holy Moses, vy did I nail Cockatoo Jack.” (To be Continued.)