Page 4 Advertisements Column 1

Kumara Times, Issue 2778, 17 August 1885, Page 4

THE FLYING DUTCHMAN IS SELLING IN KUMARA. ALL HAIL! THE FLYING DUTCHMAN COMES ! SOUND THE TIMBREL! BEAT THE DRUMS ! THIS MUST BE THE VERY MAN WHO CROSSED THE SEA IN A ERYINGPAN. Oh, mother, what do you think ? The Flying Dutchman's come. He gave me such a wink. And asked were you at home ? I said, oh yes. kind sir, Do come and see us, please, Your fame makes quite a stir O'er earth, and land, and seas. And all our friends from far Speak of your wondrous skill, As beneath the Evening Star You sell pots, pans, or pill. Such fun it was to me To hear an old man say The Flying Dutchman see ! He's better than the play. He's got all sorts of things Upon such lots of shelves, These heaps of money brings, Let's get plenty for ourselves. There are pots and pans and dishes, And plates to hold the meat, Kettles to boil the fishes, And pans to warm the feet. From every clime and nation He brings his splendid wares ; Storekeepers say " Tarnation/' Yet nothing the Dutchman cares. For he knows he can supply All things so wond'rous cheap That storemen " wipe their eye," Merchants go home and weep, Then one and all appear To see the glorious show, The Flying Dutchman here, He cannot let you go Until he's ruined quite, By selling all his ware At such a bankrupt price As to make all comers stare. (To be continued in our next.) GOD SAVE THE QUEEN! The Flying Dutchman has made himself scarce. Munchausen reported it. Komaroff swore to it, The veracity of these gentlemen is well known. Comment is unnecessary. The following reports have been handed in : I have examined the Raisins, &c, sold by Yance Klaus Hassalaer, and find them all that can be desired. (Signed) PEDRO CORASEO, Late Physician to the Cordova Hospital. We have analysed the Flour and Sugar sold by Mr Hassalaer, and found them free from adulteration, and of best quality. (Signed) BARON VON POMPERNICKLE, BARON VON HUTSURPLUTSUR, Late of the German Commissariat Department. Hear what those well-known Ladies say of Vance Klaus Hassalaer's Groceries, &c/. Your Tea is Foochow grown, and not Canton useless leaves. LADY MLNKEY NORTON. Your Kaisins are excellent, so much so that I now make puddings from half the quantity of fruit. LADY KITTY BALLOON. Your Currants are the best ever sent from the Grecian Isles. LADY NANCY VARDEN. My laundress tells me that your Blue and Starch are very superior. The clothes have merely to be dipped, thus saving much labor. MRS. BELLA GEIPHIPPS. We, the undersigned, having heard of the Goods sold by you —Mr Hassalaer —both as regards quality and prices, we will be present at your SALE at KUMARA from August 13, 1885, and if report is correct, we shall purchase largely. Young TONY WELLER, Grandson of the great Coachman SANCHO PANZA, the .faithful Esquire to the late Don Quixote, the model of true Chivalry. LADY GODIVA, of Coventry. MR and MRS SNOWBALL PICKLES. WAKEFIRED, Esq, the consistent supporter in accord Avrth himself. Ladies of the District. Several Members of Parliament. PRINCE MICHAKL K< >BBAL (in disguise). The great Russian Traveller, Mr RIJSHKY PRUSKY KOMAROFF.