MISCELLANEA.

Kumara Times, Issue 1572, 11 October 1881, Page 2

MISCELLANEA.

A body of a negro was found in the dock at Chatlestown. A jury was called together, and tiiey were all men of color. After some deliberation their verdict was—" Dat going home one berry dark night, he fell from de wharf and was killed ; dat the tide comin« in strong it floated him over to Charh-s----town, and he was drowned ; dat the weather being beery cold, he was froze to death on the spot." A millionuiie, who was looking at a level tract of land which he had just bought at an extravagant price, said to tlie agent who had sold it to him, " I do admire a rich green flat." " So do I," significantly replied the agent. A youngster was sent by his parent to take a letter to the p.-st-office and pay the postage on it. The boy returned highly elated, and said : " Father, I seed a lot of men putting

letfceivs in a Huh- place ; and when nd one was looking, I .slipped yours in for nothing." '

" My frien's," said a colored preacher, "a man's character is like afence—you can't strengthen it by white-wash* fcliougli you can cover' np the place where it is worm-eaten."

" As For hews," wrote Charles 1. to the Duke of Buckingham, in 1626, " I can sny but litell yet, Ireland beiug the onlie egg we have yet sitteh upon, and having a thike shell we. have not yet hatched it." And Eugiand has been sitting on that egg ever since.

An aged negro was recently showing the scars of wounds inflicted by the lash when he was a slave. " What a picture!" exclaimed a sympathising looker-on. " Yes," responded the color brother, " dat's de work 6b de old masters."

The following choice eitract from A, letter read in a recent breach of pro* uiise case shows that the " lovyer" musfe have been very far gone indeed:— " Dearest love, I have swallowed the" postage-stamp which waa on yonr letter) because I knew that your lips bad touched it."

A married lady declined to tell a maiden sister any of her troubles, ing, " When ig«oraiice is bliss, 'tis folly to be wise." " Yes," replied the sister) " and I have come to the conclusion that when singleness is bliss 'tis folly to be wives."

It was in a Detroit temple of justice The counsel had become quite earnest in the trial of a cau-e, when one oF them told the other that he had nd brains. To this the latter retorted thab the other counsel had no brains, and both counsels appealed to his Honor id say which was right. To this appeal his Honor, with a facetious twist in the corner of his mouth, replied that he did not wish to Contradict either of the counsel, as " both might be right. J * and he requested them both to proceed With the trial.

" Look hcah, tfncle Mose, yoti fooled me wid dat ar boss I buyed from yer last week. Hejestdrapt dead in his tracks." "He nebber drapfc dead in ln'.i tracks, of anywhar else as long ad I had liim, goiil* oil twenty years.