MISCELLANEA.

Kumara Times, Issue 1492, 9 July 1881, Page 2

MISCELLANEA.

The young milkman and his. girl stood before thnjnstiurt <>f pMHoe. —" Y>>ii take this milk—ahSiri ! —this man t'<>£ butter or foe wore'?" the mighty man of the law inquired; The gift saia* "it never a-ciird 16 her before, but she supposed she would if that was the onlywhey." An American editor thus retdrts upon a critic:—"We are sorry you dou'fc like our paper* We publish it simply to please you. We should ask you to come to the office and edit it, only, if we did, some iniquitous idiot might write and tell you how much better he could do it himself) and that annoy a nervous person like you." The> calculate that there are 3,939,77$ dogs in London. This gives its 4,000,000 souls about 31B>s 7ozß of sausage meat per head; Statistics are very satisfactory. A doctor, passing a marble-yard, called out," Good morning, Mr D £« hard at work j> I see yoU finish your grave stones as far as 'ln the memory of,' and then wait, I suppose to see whd wants a monument neit?" " Whyj yes," replied the did man j " unless somebody's ill and you are doctoriug them; then I keep straight on:" A Scotch clergyman told, his congre l gation that they should never call one another liars; but if they thought were riot exactly telling the truth, they could give a loud whistle. Shortly afterward he was couductiug an air service, and chose for his subject th 6 miracle of the loaves and fishes. He" said it Would not appear such a miracle if they recollected that the loaves werd as large as the Highlands of Scotland: Just then a baker was passing; when he gave a loud whistle. The clergyman stopped—" Who is it calls me a liar?" The baker came forward and said:—£ " I do not mean to call your reverence' a liar. I only wish you to inform the congregation where the ovens were procured to bake such large loaves.''