MISCELLANEA.

Kumara Times, Issue 1449, 20 May 1881, Page 2

MISCELLANEA.

The clergyman in a certain town, as the custom is, having published the banns of matrimony between two persons, was followed by the clerk reading the hymn, beginning with these words—i " Deluded souls, that dream of heaven." Mrs Youngwoman Wants to know " What is the best way to mark table linen I"—Leave the baby and a blackberry pie alone at the table for three minutes. - " Our hearts, our thoughts, our very beings, grow tender with age," said the boarding-house keeper thoughtfully. " Yes," said the new boarder, who was battling with a piece of fowl, "but hens do not." The landlady looked as if she saw the point. A Galveston man met a gentleman from Northern Texas, and asked how a certain mutual friend was coming on. " He is doing very well," was the reply* " What business is he at f "He has got the softest thing in the world of it. He bought a lot of Mexican donkeys at San Antonio for 3dols. apiece, and ing taken them up to hirancho, he clears 27d015. a-head on them." "Do they bring such high prices V "Noj but he lets the railroad trains ran over them, and the company has to pay him 30dols. apiece for them." ' The body of an elderly woman who was frozen to death was found- near Ross by a man named Stephen Burford,' who, at the inquest, stated that he had no rest at all one night through dreams ing about deceased. He dreamed that he had found her body by means of an iron rod with a hook at the end, Which caused him to look for her body where he found it. The jury returned a verdict to the effect that deceased died from exposure to the frost and snow. A clergyman taught an old man in his parish to read, aud had found him ian apt scholar. After the lessons had finished he had not been able to call at the cottage for some time and when he did, he only found the wife at home. " How's John ?" said the clergyman. " He's canny, sir," said the wife, " How does he get ou with his reading?" " Nicely, sir." « Ah, I suppose he will read his Bible very comfortably now." "Bible, sir I Bless you, he was out "of the Bible and into the newspaper long ago."