PADDY MURPHY JOINS THE MORMONS.

Kumara Times, Issue 1128, 10 May 1880, Page 2

PADDY MURPHY JOINS THE MORMONS.

[SHOM THE SATURDAY ADVERTISER.] Lampton Kay, Wellington, March 13th, 1880.

Be the hokey I’ve startlin’ news for yer readhera this week, and divil a word o’ lie in it. A few days ago, jist as I was sindin’ me portmantey down to the steamer to take me to Dunaydin to jine the Pasthor, I was stopped on the Kay by a sarious lookin’ *man. “Misther Murphy, I preshume,” ses he. “ The same, at yer sarvice,” ses I. “ Pd like to have a few minutes’ dia> coorse wid ye,” ses he y “jist the laste in private,” ses he. Av coorse I couldn’t do l§ss, undher the sarcum-

stances, than ax him into the Oxiclenlal, an’ “ whin he tuk the oath/' as the Yankees say, he inthrojooced himsilf as ia Mormon Eldher. He tould me that he’d jist heard o’ me raycinl convarshin’, an’ he wias sorry to see me goin’ in sich bad company. Thin he went on to ixplain the beauties o’ the Mormon Religion, an’, bedad, he wasn't long in convincin’ me o’ the troth av it, “ Mistber Murphy,” ses be, “ I can assure ye, ion the word av an ixparienced saint, that ye’ll like Polly Gammy,” ses he. “ Arrah f d’ye think so 1” ses 1 3 “is -Polly so party as all that V ses I. “ Begorra, ye dont nndherstand me,” ses h‘6 ) “ Polly Gammy is the name tve give to all our wives ; ye can marry as many as ye plaise,” ses be. “ Och, Inurther, Ink at that,” ses I; ,‘tare-an’-oxmtbera, man alive, don’t say another word, for, be me conshinse, that’s the religion to shuit me,” ses 1; “ an’ begorra, I’ll get a few more o’ the boys to jine ye,” says 11 “ but whisper,” Ses I, don’t braitbe a syllabi! to Molly or the childher, or she’ll put the comeIher on me new convarshin’,” ses I. Mum’s the word,” ses the Eldher, as 4 he rung the bell for another “ wink.” I’ll be startin’ for Ijtab be the next Prisco mail, an’ the Pasthor will be as mad as a March hare whin he hears that I’ve lift; him. The followin’ toilody was suggested by the vint:— JININ’ THE MORMONS. Arrah, boys ! did ye hear av the change that I’ve made 1 I’tn goin’ to give up the political thrade, Mesilf an’ Tom Plinn ah’ big Barney Macquaid, Wid two av the Burkes an’ O’Gormans, -And packin’ our baggages up for a thrip, An Eldher from Utah has give us a dip, We’ve bound for Salt Lake in a beautiful ship, Begorra, we’re jinin’ the Mormons. Hufroo! me bonld hearties, I’m dancin’ wid glee» ’The sweet little craythurs are waitin’ for me, I’m proud as ine ancesthor, Darby M'Gee, Who thrash'd all the Saxons an’ Normans. I’m free from Sir George an’ political sthrife, /The Eldher has taught me to alther me life, In Utah I’ll not be tied down to one wife. Begorra, I’m jinin’'the Mormon's. Och tundher-an-turf 1- how the darlihts will thry.. To Conquer me heart, as the homes will cry—- ■“ Sure we are yer wife, Pah an’ fais that’s no.lie,” An’ thin for a kiss they’ll be Swarmin’-. I’ve wasted me years wid. Sir George an.’, wid Mao, But now on New .Zayland I’ll turn me back, -I think I am now on an illigant tack, I’U make, a most beautiful Mormon. Paddy Murphy.