WISE AND OTHERWISE.

King Country Chronicle, Volume V, Issue 376, 8 July 1911, Page 7

WISE AND OTHERWISE.

WHY HE COULDN'T MISS. No doubt about it, Bunker was playing a great game. Every time be drove his golf-ball clean and true, and the force behind his strokes was something tremendous. Bunker's opponent began to swear. Why was Bunker playing so magnificently to-day ? Usually, he was a muff of the muffs. But his amazement was increased when he suddenly noticed that the ball Bunker was using was ornamented with a coloured photograph of a lady. "Excuse me, Bunker, old man," hs began ; "but"—indicating the picture —"what's the idea ?"

"My mother-in-law," laconically explained Bunker, as, with a vicious sweep, he sent the ball flying. "It does me good—good ! You understand ? Whoosh !" And he tramped off gaily after th? ball. THE SIXTY-FIRST. "Grite swindle! .Sixty victims! Piper ! Extry speshul ! Piper ! Sixty victims ! Grite swindle !" The excited newsboy dashed along the streets at the speed of a Bleriot express, and landed in the white waistcoat of a City magnate. "What's that I hear you shouting ?" gasped the gentleman, as he recovered his wind. "Great swindle ! Sixty victims !" "Yussir ! Pipersir ?" The City magnate parted with his penny. "Hi, boy !" he shouted, as the youngster began to edge away. "But I don't see any mention of a great swindle here ?" "Quiteritesir !" piped the urchin. "That's the swindle ! You're the sixty-first victim !" And while the disappointed buyer stood speechless on the pavement, the newsboy darted off again, yelling: "Grite swindle ! Extry speshul ! Sixty-one victims ! Piper !"

Jot long ago a bride and bridegroom from the country visited Lon.don during their honeymoon. Now, the young bride, as is usual at this period, thought her husband was the best-looking man that ever lived. One night they started for the theatre, and as she clung fondly to his arm and gazed up into his goodlooking face while they walked along, the cabmen began plying for hire. "Hansom ?" shouted the nearest cabby.

The bride smiled at her husband. "Hansom, lady ?" sang out the next one, seductively. . She smiled at the cabby until he thought he had found a fare. "Hansom ?" called the next one ; and "Hansom?" "Hansom?" echosc all along the whole line until they came to the last.. "Hansom ?" he said, appealing to her directly. She looked again at her husband and then at the cabby. "Of course he is," she replied ; •and clutching his arm convulsively she exclaimed : "Oh, George, dear, isn't it lovely to be so handsome that even men in the streets pay tribute to your beauty,; and you my husband, too ? Oh, George !" And George said not a word to enlighten her.