Wit and Humour.

King Country Chronicle, Volume II, Issue 95, 14 August 1908, Page 4

Wit and Humour.

All They Had .—"I should like a roast chicken and some asparagus," was the repuest of a motorist at an obscure inn. The waiter, gloomily shook his head and declared that the order could not be executed. "Can I have a duck then?" "No, sir." "Have you any mutton chops?" "Not one, sir." "Well, if you have nothing to eat, bring me a drink. Have you any wine in the place.?" "Sir," replied the waiter with a profound sigh, "we are out of wine." "Them in the name of all that's refreshing, what have, you got in the house?'' The brokers, sir!" replied the waiter. Negative Appreciation.- In a certain village there is a little inn which is rather poorly conducted. The landlady gets every visitor to write soincthin about it in a kind of autograph album that she keeps on her drawingroom table. One visitor wrote in the alburn many vein's ago "Quoth the raven--" The landlady did not understand that quotation. She was not well up in Edgar Allen Poe. And ever since that time she has shown the cryptic, to every guest, entreating him to'tell her, if he can, its meaning. But the guests were always too polite to tell her. They pretend they do not know. And hence, year after year, to every visitor that comes, the poor landlady with her album gives herself away.