Excerpta.
A Story of Sebastopol.
A story of Sebastopol is told-by a physician who was one of the English medical staff in the Crimean War. , A mandate had gone forth to the effect that a certain suburb of Sebastopol should be raided by a select body of English ; the attack was to take place at midday, when the enemy were at dinner.
The venture was so quickly executed that it was completely successful. The occupants of the cottage had fled, leaving their dinners untouched on the table, and the canaries in their cages. In one cottage was found a child, about six months old, and asleep in its cradle.
An officer carried away the little one as a prisoner of war, and sent the news of his capture to headquarters. Word came at once from Lord Raglan, ordering that a flag of truce should be sent out next morning, and that all possible search and enquiry should be made for the mother of the child. Some of the officers were amused that so much trouble should be taken about a stray baby, but the chiefs orders had to be obeyed.
No mother was forthcoming, however, to acknowledge the lost waif. But there was a woman in the Rifle Brigade with a baby a few weeks old who was willing to undertake double duty. About three weeks elapsed, and then ‘ Raglan the Good’ sent another message to'his staff, who had forgotten all about the adopted child, directing, that enquiry should be made after* the mother and her twins.’ Word came back that the two children were thriving admirably, but that the mother herself looked worn and tired. ‘ How many cows are there ?’ asked Raglan. ‘One, sir,’ was the reply. * Then,’ said the self-denying chief, ‘send the woman down a bottle of milk every morning.’ After this the little army protegee became very popular. A chaplain christened her Alma, and at the end of the war the Queen adopted her and gave her a liberal education.
Duping the Exciseman.
A good story is told of how an Irish peasant very neatly got the better of an extremely pompous Inland Revenue officer, who had just arrived in the Irishman’s native village to put a stop to, if he could, the smuggling so prevalent in the district. Patrick seeing the officer one day, approached him and said, * Look here, sor, what will you give me if 1 will show you a private still.’ * The officer, with visions of promotion in his eye, instantly answered, * I will give a ten pound note if you will show me that private still.’ * Done,’ said Pat, and the * tenner ’ immediately changed hands, * but are you prepared for a long walk, sor ?’ The exciseman eagerly answered in the affirmative, and the two set off together. On and on they went, over hill, wood, bog, etc., until the exciseman was almost ready to drop. * Have we to go much further,’ feeblv enquired the officer. ‘ Whist, sor, hold yer tongue wid ver, we are just coming to the very place.’ The exciseman held his tongue, but was astonished oti turning round the next corner to see a wellknown military barracks looming up a few yards away. * Whist, now,’ said Pat, leading rhe unsuspecting officer up to one of the sentry boxes where a fine - looking soldier stood at attention. * You sec that man,' said Pat, ‘ well that’s my cousin Mick O’Cassidy. He joined rhe Inniskellens a year ago, and wants to be a sergeant, hut he is a private still.’
With the last remark Pat * hooked it,’ leaving Her Majesty’s representative stupified and with his pocket considerably encroached upon by the absence of the ten pound note.
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https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/newspapers/KAIST18941218.2.23
Bibliographic details
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Kaikoura Star, Volume XIV, Issue 800, 18 December 1894, Page 7
Word count
Tapeke kupu
616Excerpta. Kaikoura Star, Volume XIV, Issue 800, 18 December 1894, Page 7
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