MISCELLANEOUS.

Inangahua Times, Volume IV, Issue 4, 3 December 1877, Page 2

MISCELLANEOUS.

The following sarid-comic account of wbaj it calls a most imposing semi-mili-tary spectacle, is given by the P>!ew|sealaud Times:.— lfor ths first time sinoe thei.r incorporation with the Armed Constabulary the WolliDgtou Police were ordered to parade, for iuspeotion. The parade ground situated, $t tlie rear of the Police Station, and in |i?e and general appearanco is not unjilje the Champ do Mar» on a very reduc^^ scale. It is about 20ft, x 10ft., ifl, bounded on thj no^tli by flj (jorrujjated i,r,on fence, 09. the

3OUth by a water tank, on the west by a jorse thicket, and on the enst by the In'olvent Court. 4t the hour appointed 'or th© parade there were present Brign--3ier?sflneral Moule, Colonel Shearman, Major Atcheßon, Captain Smith, Lieutenant Farrell, t*o .corporals, ifour pritrate§, and the co,olc. The band consisted of two «toall boyajsnth tin whistles, who uut of comtfi^t^ihe^olunel, piay*d tbo " March T^ri?Bgb Jhe parade erounW^ » excellent order, Swing to the e*£*ipn 9 of two gentlemen committed for tsPenty.lour -Lours tor drunkenness, aided by « garden rake and a watering pot. The/trpppii having come to attention, one of thf cprporals said, "There'll be no inspection, to*day, pekaw the Supreme Coort )» setyn , and yes might disturb it." Tkep#tfp jras then dismissed. fiirwhoTe proceedings passed off without a hitch, if wo except a couple ot slight accidents. One private* sat down on a bayonet, and the legs of the Major had a difficulty with his sword,, which caused him to try how far he could dig his nose into the earth. The services of three eminent medical men however, prevented auy serious injury. The grept Keeley motor buhble has, burst at >ast. He has become bankrupt with liabilities amounting to £100,UOO. In his examination he admitted that the wonderful discovery, with which he has tried to delude tho world for the last five or 9iz years, was all humbug. In connection with the contradictory telegram^ published yesterday regard* ing the Pope's health, the following item by the Suez; mail may be of interest : — The Pope is dying, and the Vatican is full of intrigues and conspiracies in respect to the succession 1 . The, new Pope is said to the already nominated in Cardinal Panenianeo, who has the qualification of being a feeble old man, upwards of ?0 years of age. It is not uplinely that the powers will have something to say in the questiou. In an article dealing with paint and distemper from fl sanitary point of view, the Sanitary lteoord says -,—We unhesitat* inulv express our opinion that, effiteris paribus, v house with painted or distempered walls is more likely to be healthy than one with papered walls. Hitherto the objections to lead paint and distemper have been that the former 13 injurious to the health of the workmen, and that the white and deljcate shades of colour are so soon uffeoted by expoaure to gas fumes, Ac, nnd that distemper cannot be wnshed. Wo have for some time had under observation the paints nnd washable distemper ot the Silicate Paint Company, of Liverpool (L)ndou office, 107 Cannon streets), but although I they Bre strongly reeoin mended to us we wished to have practical experience of them before us, We are now iv a pesiti a to state tlyt the advantages claimed by the manufacturers for these materials are net overstated, and we fully PSpeH tliat ere long they will entirely supersede lead paints uud paperhaujinsis. The objections we have mentioned arc not applicable to the paint and distemper of the Silicate Paint Co. , neither of them contain a particle of lead or other poison in any furiu, and therefore ure not injurious to the workmen, the white and delicate shades are not effected in the slightest degree, even when exposed to the fumes of sulphuretted gas, and both are washable ; ihev are easily upplied, and may be used plainly and cheapy enough to suit the woi kman'd cottage or decorat ivel; for the mausion. We strongly recommend the use of the washable distemper for the walls of bedrooms, feeling sure that anyone who onre uses it will never revert to paperbanuing** It was only last week that one ol the i&edicul journals oomrflfhted on the pap<Mr,^alU iv the New "Victoria Dwellings 'Battersea, aud referred to distemper as being " cheaper., prettier, and more wholesome." •'Bohemian," in his odd notes in »Ue Brisbane Weel;, relates tU© following morceau, which is too good to he lost :. " You do.n't know Joe Thompson, the Victorian racin^man, do you? Neither do I; but I beard a, good story of him the other day from a Melbourne friead. Joe is one 0$ those shrewdy illiterate, and, by no roeana too conscientious, men. who have amas&ed large fortune* by making books on horse races. Except &r his foe clothes, fin#. house, furniture*, horses and equipage, his is the same rougk old piece of goods as. when he used to haffk, fish and sell hot pies. By some ujiaccountaJWe means or other he recently got an in— t vitation to the Government, Hot^e on tho occasion of a ball there. . When S«. George discovered the mistake, he deputed, to Captain Pitt the delicate aud disagree* able duty of getting Joe 'out of that 1 as. speedily as pp%siUle. The captain started on his errand,, aud after a short search discovered the bold hero diligoutly aud conscientiously getting outside as much of the vice reual champagne as possible, and, at the same time, relating to an amazed knot of listeners pithy anecdotes of tho turf and{ personal adventures of a decidedly stirring character. Captain Pitt took Joe On onia side, and as gently as possible informed him he h^d got in by a mistake and must get out again as soon as he conveniently could. * A'l r,is!)t old man,' said Joe, *<but just W us t»6 'aye another bottle o^ fizz lust.* To, this the captain 'cohsen'.eds as the readiest m,e«ns of getting the man away peaceably.. When j the bottle was <jmpty Joe prepared to depart, affirming in the most and emphatic manner that he dick^.'t bear (he Governor the least malice, in the world. He then held out his hand to Captain Pitt, as though to. shake hands, bi\t slipped a sovereign iftto hia. fingers,, w.h,\9pering as he hurried away, • J allus treats servants same whether their masters is civil or not/ Before the captain, could recover his astonishment and hand back, the 1 money Joe was cono. I used to, know Captain Pitt very well when be was. in Brisbane here, and Xcau thoroughly understand what his feelings would be. unde? such circumstances." Tha Nineteenth Centu.ry, Edmond Aboa^'s paper, reqommends that pending the adoption of cremation, and to pat a stop, to the accumulation of human, bones, that the latter be sold to farmers, to be dissolved in acids to manure their cropß, the proceeds of the sale to. be devoted to ths sustenance of the poor. The late l£he de Beaumont, a noted geologist, was also of tho 9ame opinion ; tho catacombs of Paris, contain the 1 s' cl^o;i3 of fire mUljpas of peeole.

The actor Got, after dressing— us an outlandish oharacte^— for a partj tui»k * cqb to the theatre, according to hta habit; the vehicle suddenly came to n fill! stop, the axle had Woken; Got jumped out and fini^htd thi 4 journey ou foot, followed by a regiment U gamins, and later, by the firedffh. The "Coffer of Malakoff" tragedy has been disposed of. The tower uear V*nvesisiUe only ruin caused by the Prussian fire, which h&s been left '* standing." It wus cared by an old couple, named tippelletier. The husband was a housepainter by trade, sod rag-picker when work was slack, his wife kept sn eating house ond * shooting gallery. There lived with them a little bay, aged fire, nephew of a customer named Albert. The latter cohabited with a prostitute called Lavoitte. lie wan a Belgian, and had left his country, a deserter, for his country's good. Une morning the old woman, in August, 1876. was found in a well, near her house, her head smashed to atoms. All inquiries failed to discover the authors of the crime, till a few months ago, when Albert voluntarily surrendered to the police, confessed he and I^avoitte were uuilty. The motive of the muftler was robbery, and jealousy led to its dispovery. Albert enticed the old woman into a cellar in the garden on pretence to catch sd&wrabbits, escaped from their pen { feeling nervous, he bought eight sous of coguac. and thus fortified, he gave the victim a blow on tne bea I. He then called ou I^voiue, concealed in the 0.-llar, to approach and do her part, which 3ltc did with a broom handle. The child was looking on, eX claimed, "Oh? Uncle," nnd ran away- ; he repeated the evidcnco iv Court ; the assassins threw the breath* ing body under straw, and the woman swept up the cellar. Am they both looked pale, they painted their checks and went; to breakfast" In the sight they dropped the body into the well, gently, as Albert said, ' becate I venerate the dead." He has been sentenced to be guillotined, tho womtsn to transportation for We, A sad apcident occured at the printing office of the Moniteur ; a man's, arm was caught iv the wheels of a machine, whipped ojf, and deposited into tho journals, lie was conveyed to, the hospital j the wrenched of? hand was placed on a table inside the office, and before it the man's cap to receive contributions. At Brest, an hotelke^per in tho middle of tho night entered the bedrooms of five travellers, he cut the throats pf three with a razor (they are dead), nn\i seriously wounded two others and tbW'. disembowelled himself. At Troyes, a wife was strundling a barrow full of potatoes along the bank of a river when ahe slipped and fell in. The husband x a little distance b*f"o-e hex, rescued the barrow, and left hia wife. She was saved by some women in the neighbourhood, who, in addition, gave chase to the brute. He alleged it was ** providential divorce," and did not like to interfere.