HAPPY MOMENTS

Hokitika Guardian, 19 March 1932, Page 6

HAPPY MOMENTS

“TEE BEST OF EVERYTHING.”

The doctor of a country villag; had two children who were acknowledged as the prettiest little,,girls in the district. While the'pair were out .walking one day they happened to pass two small boys. One lived in the village and the other was' a visitor.

“I say,” said th"e latter, “who are those little girls ?” “They are the doctor’s children,” replied the village boy. “He always keeps the' best for himself.”

THERE’S A DIFFERENCE

Teacher: How many bones nave you in your body. Willie: Nine hundred. Teacher : That’s a good many more than I have.: Willie: Yeah, but I had sardines for lunch.

NO FOOLIN’

A freshman at Indiana University, taking out a permit to use his car while in' residence, found himself confronted by the following question : “Purpose for which car is to be used.” In the blank he wrote: “To ride in.”

POST-GRADUATE COURST*

Wife (recently married) : Have voa really-engaged a cook, darling? I didn’t think we could afford to keep one. Husband: Well, we can’t afford to keep one long, so you had better Jearn all you can whilst you have the chance.

compliments

A well-known judge was entertaining a party of 'friends in a popular restaurant on New Year’s Day, when a beautiful lady ' entered. Judge (to friends, loud enough for the lady to-hoar) : Jove, what.a pretty woman.. The lady- turned round and sweetly said : And what a good judge.

A CASE IN POINT,

The speaker at the street corner was in fine form as he waved his arms fnenziedly 'over the heads of his audience.

“Trade is deadlie shrieked. “Can anyone tell me of the case where the demand exceeds the supply ?” “Yes,” said the little man.; “when it's an income 'tax demand.”

, LOST.

A woman called at the Bank of England and tasked if she might consult someone about her War Loan holdings. A clerk came forward and' asked her, “I s it « case of conversion or redemption.

Madame?” “Conversion or redemption?” faltered the woman. “Er- pardon meis this the Bank of England or the Church of England p”

DOPING OUT THE. SLOGAN

The teacher 'had' beep.; reading the story of 1 “Alii Baba and the Forty Thieves” to her class of small boys. When she reached /the end she closed the book and proceeded to question them regarding the story. “Now, can anyone tell me,” she said, “what AH Baba said when he wanted to open the

entrance to-the cave ?"• One -child, an ardent film fan, promptly replied: “Open, se« me!”