IN MERRY MOOD

Hokitika Guardian, 5 June 1931, Page 4

IN MERRY MOOD

“Are you iu favour of women taking part in public 1 fe r ’ “It’s all right if you really want the affairs public.” Suffer (to dentist): What? Five shillings to take out a front tooth f I should say not! I’ll pick a fight on my way home. Hostess: So you’ve been in Switzerland doctor? Did you do much sleighing? Doctor: No; I had no patients. Park Orator: Having said all I’m going to say, I will return to what I was coinin’ to when I was interrupted, and repeat what I was prevented from savin’! Clergyman (to father who has just had his baby christened Homer): I suppose Homer is your favourite poet ? Father : Poet! Lor’ no, sir ! I keep pigeons. Magistrate: Your will be fined ten shillings, and never let me see your face again. Prisoner: I can’t promise that, sir. And why not? I’m still going to be barman at the Nag’s Head. “Why d d you leave your last place?” “Well. mum. the master and muss us was always quarrelling.” “Really!-I thought the Browns were a devoted couple.” “They may he that, mum; but when it wasn’t me an’ ‘or, it was me an’ ’im.” Tt was Tommy’s first day at ; school. Shortly after the opening of the first lesson he walked up to the teacher’s desk and said: “T ain’t cot no pencil.” The teacher, a shocked expression on her face, said: “Oh, Timothy, I haven’t a pencil!” A sympathetic look crossed the hoy’s face,' and lie replied: “Ye ain’t, either? Well, we’re both in the same fix, ain’t we?”