QUIPS AND CRANKS

Hokitika Guardian, 16 October 1930, Page 8

QUIPS AND CRANKS

PROPERLY PLUCKED. ( He: You were no spring chicken when l married you. She: No, I was a Little goose. WHY,DAD GOES BROKE. “The wedding reception beggared description,” says a report in a local paper. Not to mention the bride’s father. YOU NEVER CAN TELL. Piggly: Is my face dirty, or is it my magiiiation? Wiggly : Your face isn’t; I don’t enow about your imagination. LOCKING UP THE MATCHES. “I never could understand why a fellow should not be allowed to have more than one wife.” “Well, after you are married you’ll realise that the law protects those who ire incapable of protecting themselvis.” ’ HANDSOME COMPENSATION. “What did father say when you told aim you were going to take me away from liim?” “He seemed to feel his loss keenly at first, but I squared things with a good cigar.” END OF THE TRAIL. “Need any more talent for your motion-picture dramas ?” ' “We might use you. Had any experience at acting without audiences ? 1 “Acting; without audiences is what brought me here.” RECIPE FOR BLISS. A real-estate salesman of West Texas had jfist finished describing the glorious opportunities of that part of the country. “All west Texas needs to become the garden spot of the world is good people and water,” he said. “Hull!” replied the prospect. “That’s all hell needs.”