THE PROBLEM OF DIVORCE

Hokitika Guardian, 3 April 1929, Page 8

THE PROBLEM OF DIVORCE

SOLUTION NEEDED

LADY ALICE FERGUSSON’S SUGGESTIONS.

Practical suggestions for dealing with the problem of divorce in New Zealand are made by Lady Alice Fergusson, Dominion president of the Mothers’ Union, in a letter which she lias addressed to Mrs W. G. Roberts as Diocesan President. Lady Alice’: letter, which is published in the “Church News’’ is as follows:

Dear Mrs Huberts, —You will re member that at our last Domiuion Council meeting we again carnesth discussed the marriage question am! bow we could help to bring borne to the women of New Zealand the importance of bringing up our voting people wiLh sound views on this matter. J think we would all like to think wo were helping in this, but the question is “How is to be done?’’ All members of the Mothers’ Union, who join it with a lull knowledge oi its rides and aims, presumably bole the view that marriage is sacred and a union for life. So, then, when wo insist on these points in our addresses and lectures on the subject, we an only preaching to the converted 'and declaring things which our member;

already believe and bold. I Hat is not enough. Another wa\ has been suggested—that member:, should be asked to study the divorce statistics, and have impressed on Limit minds the alarming numbers of home: biuken up during the year in our Dominion. This perhaps would be salutary as a means of impressing on ns a real danger which lies before us in oui national life. But that also is not enough. A suggestion really constructive, w« believe, was made- by the Mothers’ Fnlull to the General Synod last year :—i.e., that clergymen in each diocese be asked to give- some Leaching on the matter during their instruction of continuation candidates. This, 1 think, would he really valuable, especially if given from not only the Church standpoint, but from the national and human standpoints as well. This, howeve/, also is not enough.

.1 want to ask all the Diocesan Presidents whether we could not this year make a special effort, and appeal through our branches to aii members to make a point of giving llk.br own children instruction about marriage. After all, the words of tlm mother make more impression than any words from a stranger. And I would like also to beg that the instruction he given on the broadest possible lines. It- does not seem to be enough to say in these days, “our Church does not allow or recognise divorce.” or “Marriage for Christian people is indissoluble.” What is Liu* use of laying down these axioms for the modern young person when every day they see, in spite of the Church nob allowing it, that marriages are dissolved, by people born and brought up as professed 'Christians? No, there must he deep and more human teaching than that.

f should like to tell our members not to dwell on what I might call the negative .subject of divorce, but rather to study a positive one—the achievement of happy and successful marriages. Ask them to make a .point of speaking of marriage to their growing hoys and girls, as opportunity shall arise, long before they come to the marrying age. Let them show their children that they look on marriage as a lifelong union; and that if we as a race, as a whole nation, cease to do so, we should soon become decadent. Let them show too that they look on it as the greatest adventure in human happiness, and also a something sacred and holy, only to ho entered into with the help of the Church and with Gocl’s blessing. When the children are themselves at last on the threshold of marriage, let it he impressed on them that not only is it a matter of happiness, hut a matter of duty and responsibilities and sellsacrifice as well, and that only 111 rough these ways will the best and highest happiness he found. Albove all, let mothers try and show their children “bv their own example” what a successful married life is. The best way after all to show children the sanctity of marriage is to live that sanctity 'before their eyes.

I won’t go further into this; endless ways of teaching the sanctity of marriage to our young people will come to mothers once they begin to think of teaching it. T do, however, make this definite appeal to you as Diocesan President, to pass on this suggestion to our branches as a distinct piece of work to try and achieve this year. , May I emphasise again what I specially wish to point out, that in making this appeal to our

oid! Iters it is nn(, io my mind, the Church view of divorce that needs dwelling upon. ‘ 1 Tint is well known Lo all Church members: and sometimes in these days, especially in the cases of tragedy and misery which we all sometimes come across, I fear it fails in its appeal. I would lay stress on the need for early teaching, positive teaching, of things that will make for a happy, holy Christian marriages. Among these should he the spirit among young married people which, if differences should come between them and difficulties seem to stand in Lhe way of happiness, arms them with weapons of courage, duty and unselfishness, and makes them determined not to throw up the task, as we see too many couples inclined to do, hut to conquer all obstacles and win through to success. In ordinary circumstances there will be no scope or place, in such marriages for such a tiling as divorce which after all, as a rule, is only sought as a desperate remedy for spoilt and shattered lives. Divorce is at least no greater sin than the sins of the spirit which often lead up to that tragedy. It is those sins which mothers, by Llie-ir teaching, must prevent.