THE SEAMY SIDE

Hokitika Guardian, 10 April 1926, Page 4

THE SEAMY SIDE

TAIJES TOLD TO THE MAGISTRATE (By R. E. Corder in “Daily Mail.”) Mr IV. H. S. Oultun conies to Lambeth from Liverpool. He is a patient man, with deep-set eyes and a quiet voice, and he gives out summonses as if they were railway tickets. After a little more metropolitan! experience he will learn that it is easier to grant a summons than to hear the ease, and a lew words from the warrant officer .not only saves the magistrate hours of hard work hut does more' good in the end. A warrant oflicer has bis own methods of bringing peace to warring homes. Yesterday we had the lend between the one and the live. A middle-aged woman who lives at the top of a building and has nerves sought and obtained .summonses against a family of live who stood behind her in a row—mother, son and his wife, and two daughters. The warrant officer. who used to be a. sergeant-major, carefully paced them off. and the One began her story: “’I his family behind, ’’ she said, “made a raid on me.’ “Oh!” exclaimed the mother. “Ali!” remarked one of the daughters. "Keep quiet!” ordered the warrani officer. " "Five policemen came to protect me.” said the One. 'I he mother raised her eyes and arms in silent protest, one ol tho daughters laughed so scornfully that it sounded like icicles falling in a chilled street. “They knocked me on the floor and jumped on me,” continued the One. The mother groaned, the two daughf.eis clasped hands, and the sou’s wife moved her lips in silent prayer. The son betrayed no emotion hue lurtively caressed a scratched nose. “What summonses do you want •” asked Mr Oulton briskly, and one expected him to add. "I can recommend our spring line in assaults. _ •r want two against the daughter-. ’ -aid the One. now quite liusiiie---lii e. ,*ii,-. against the mother, one against an eigliteen-years-old hoy who damaged lay ribs, and one against the other son’-' wife.” “That will bo 10s,” murmured me warrant officer, who really ought to have added. “And is there anything else this morning, madam!"” Then Ihe live had their Inrn while Ihe One had hysterics in a corner. The mot her led off’with a complaint that began a voar ago and ended oil the previous night ; the son complained that tho One's husband hit him on the nose; the son’s wife declared that the One held her by ihe throat, banged her head against the wall, and smashed her eye-glasses; and the daughters demanded revenge for defamation ol character. All live were granted summonses. ami the One finished her attack of hysterics in the corridor. A woman missionary seated next to me murnmord, “A friend of mine works among savages. What a peacelill time she must have!" • A woman carrying a hoy ol six who had a hat on his head and a comforter in his mouth began to make a complaint against her sister. "Take that kid’s hat oil!" ordered the usher. "He’s only a child!” snapped the mother, firmly fixing the hat while the hoy hit on to his oomlorter and glowered at the usher. "That ho.v is too old for a. com toiler.” remarked the warrant, officer. “You mind your own business.” retorted the mother. "5 on haven’t paid for it.’

"Now for it,” said the warrant ollieer to tiie usher as the next applicant took her place in the line. “Here ( -nies ihe gramophone.” He v.as right. Beginning in a. high-pitched voc-e. the woman, with a non-stop action, recite;! '■.or. troubles, which, summarised. meant that she expected her bus. band, In m whom she is separated and v, !u. pay- her eg n week, to pay the piles ol her house. As she talked ihe usher groaned and the warrant officer vawiled and the clerk wailed, "t an i you stop her;'” “No sir.” replied the warrant officer promptly. “She is not that sort. A girl-wile, who had been married 1.5 months, wanted a separation iron: her husband, to whom she will almost need an ini! "dm ! ion. Alter living a few weeks in fiirui-hed rooms he went hack home ami she I't'Dirm d to her mother. Since leaving the lying-in hospital where she had a baby he had not sent her a larting. •‘Will you have a summons for desertion or a separation order?” asked Mr Oulton. "They Lot It need a shaking,” temarked Idle woman missionary, v. ith whom 1 cordially agreed. A young unman wearing a green end silver Imt, looked annoyed when sue was told lu apply to the county court to get hack £sil) worth of furniture which she said was detained hy a landlady. “But the eonuly court people sent me liere,” she protested. "I'm like a shuttlecock.” When I saw Charles Brown f thought lie had the worst-worn face in London. But. that was before I saw another Charles who came later. Charles Brown, who had been lighting, bad a face covered with bruises; the other Charles had no face, at all—nothing hut bruises. To parody Tennyson. “His eyes were homes of dark despair,” am! looked as if lie Imd got the worst nl one round with a cirenlar saw.

Somewhere I have read that a man with no lobes to his ears has criminal instincts, so when a young man. appeared in the dock with missing lobes I concluded: “Here, is a confirmed criminal.” But 1 was wrong. True, he had stolen a sack of sugar from his employers, hul he had such an excellent character that a director of the linn, said he was willing to take him hack, and the magistrate hound Inm over with a lecture. The capture, liv the way. was a. very smart effort by :» plainclothes tonstable, who saw the man leaving a tramwav-car with the sack. A iew adroit questions and the man dropped the sack' and ran. Such is the power the conscience, hacked bv a policeman, even if he is in plain clothes.

I Three young hooligans, very much l j Reused with themselves, entered the dock smiling. They had given a lot of j trouble by linking arms, forcing pc-des-I trians off the footpath, and making in ' decent remarks to a constable who warned them. Mr Oulton fined them 1 each 10s. The usual line at Lambeth for , I this sort of things is 40s. “He was selling gold watches at six ! |H>nce each,” remarked an officer of a smartly dressed young man charged ! with obstruction. “I had iust a few ' • to do.” explained the pedlar ainbig- | nously.