AMUSEMENTS.

Hokitika Guardian, 18 August 1920, Page 1

AMUSEMENTS.

POLLARD’S PICTURES.

“THE HAYSEEDS AT THE MELBOURNE CUP.”

To-night at the Princess Theatre, Pollards will screen the third of Beaumont Smith’s Australian stories “The Hayseeds at the Melbourne Cup.” You see Dad buy the moke and they take it to Melbourne to train it for the Cup. You see Dad p'ut it all over the “books” when Mr Hayseed’s “Cornstalk” romps home. Poppy’s little romance is in this series too. Dad and the boys were fair game for the “jocks” at the stables, but they were able to hold their own. By eripes! Hayseeds ain’t no mugs.

DAD WRITES. Dear Townies, —we’ve ’ad some luck lately, and just quietly the time or our lies at melbourne. I bort an ’orse at a sail, and it turned out a bosker. ’Arold arst meter buy won, an’ i sed no i’ll buy a cloaths ’orse for mum insted, but strewth, them boys worrited me into it. They wuz a bookie bloke after it two but i pipped ’im an’ got in fust. Well, we take it ’»me, an’ ’arold starts two trane an’ get ’is wate down for the cup; ’e says as trainin’ ain’t wot it’s cracked up ter be, e’d ’ave give a quid for a long beer, but tiler bloke wot’s training ’im wuz too ’ot for ’arold and’ ’e never got ’is beer. We goes down to melbourne, i goes two luke after the ’orse, mum sez she’s cornin’ two bike after me, an’ she did two, yew bet. We seen the parlamint ’ouso, ’as i sez to mum as i’d buy ’er a ’ouse like it if i wins ther cup—mum sez no, she’d never sleep at nites think, in’ abowt all them steps ter be washed every mornin’.

Poppy’s bloke, ’arry, ’e gets inter trubble with their ‘books’ an’ i ’as tor ’olp ’im out ,but ith awl cum out rite in ther end. Them smart jocky boys tries to get won outer us “Ayseeds, but as ’Ayseeds ain’t no mugs, mu’ wen we’d played “ziff” an’ “o’parrv” we knew all their jokes.

Ycr never seen anything like ther cup; ther “books” tried to pinch ower colt, but jack ’an ’ary an’ ’arold put ,it awl over ’em. ’arv ’ad just purposed two poppy, an’ wen ther books nocked ’im owt ’e just forgot wot.poppy ad sed, an’ ad ter do it hwl agen—but poppy new a good bloke an ’sez yes agen.

Well, mum an’ the kids ’ad the time of there life at the corse, fin’ the kids put a lire on the lorne till i stopt ’em. mum wants two no wy they calls it a stand wen people sits in it, an’ she asks me were the birds in the birdcage is—i ’as ter ter ’er two shut up, or they’ll think were barmy coots.

We wins the cup, after nearly losing it throw jini gettin’ mixed up with an actress tart, an wen yew sees the race, yew’ll think the trip to melbourne woz worth wile. ,

Were back at stoney creek now, an’ if yew bring along the missus and kids we’ll owl be glad two see yew. DAD HAYSEED.

On Thursday Pollards will screen Mary Miles Minter in a beautiful Irish story, a tale of two true daughters of Erin.’ Also the last episode of “The Man of Might.”