MISCELLANEOUS NOTES

Hawke's Bay Tribune, Volume XVII, 19 November 1927, Page 8

MISCELLANEOUS NOTES

Prize-fighting is a cruel game, al! right. But a million dollars will buy a lot of arnica.

Tunney says his name .is pronounced to rhyme with funny. Ah, yes, and funny rhymes with money. J have it now!

Two visitors were exploring the grounds of a celebrated Casino and were rather startled to come upon a small graveyard. Upon the stones there were neither names for incsrip tions. “Runny thing that,” commented one of the visitors. “I expect these are the graves of gamblers and if that’s the case it wouldn’t be very easy to find a suitable epitaph, would it?” “Oh, I dunno,” said the other. “How about “Waiting for the Last Trump’ ?”

There is a certain golfer who ; s so completely absorbed in his pastime that mere domestic matters have long since ceased to trouble him. He has a small son called William. One evening, upon returning from the Golf Club, hisc wife remarked: “Wil liam tells me that he was caddying for you all this afternoon.” “Is that so?” exclaimed the astonished man. “Well, now you mention it. 1 thought I had seen that bov before. • • * A member of the Marylebone Cricket Club’s team which visited the West Indies last season tells two good stories of the interest the visitors aroused amongst the natives On one occasion an M.C.C. batsman was temporarily blinded as he was about to make his stroke. He complained to the umpire, and. eventually a “darky” was discovered in an adjacent tree armed with a small nocket mirror! Tn another game the batsman felt something hard beneath the matting. This was uplifted, and beneath were found about two hundred very small pebbles, arranged in a circle.

A man with a very serious mien entered a doctor’s consulting room “Doctor,” he began, “I’ve come to consult you about my wife. 1 think she’s pining away. I can’t get her to take the slightest in terest in life.” “Indeed,” said the medico, “this sounds serious. Pray proceed.” “Well, doc., I’ve tried chatting to her about cricket, billiards, golf, racing and tennis, but it's not a bit of good. I might as well talk to a brick wall." » » « At a famous holiday resort in Europe a fashionable young lady arranged to have lessons from the golfpro. She appeared in a most unsuitable chic garb. Said the pro diffidently: “Don’t you think, madam, that your heels are a little high for a game like golf?” “Not at all,” replied the radiant young person airily, “They’ll give me an excellent grip on the greens.”