Untitled

Hawke's Bay Times, Volume 19, Issue 1221, 13 January 1872, Page 2

A thief returned some abstracted clothing that proved coo small, and wrote to the owner that he would wait for him to grow.. " Fortune's hand," says a povertystricken writing master, "isremarkable

for its heavy down-strokes." A sugar whistle has been invented hv an ingenious Yankee, which is guaranteed to give sweet music. When a man has no design but to, speak plain truth he may say a great deal in a very narrow compass. Of the 1001 young ladies who fainted last year, 998 fell into the arms of gentlemeu, two fell on the floor, and one. into a water-butt. True religion shows its influence in every part of our conduct; it is like the sap of a living tree, which penetrates the most distant boughs. On hearing the report that the shocking condition of the firemen's hose had resulted in the destruction of a large amount of property, dear Mrs Chibbles sat up all night darning her husband's stockings. Mr D. W. Clifford, a young gentler, man living at Leavenworth, Indiana, recently advertised in the Louisville Democrat for a wife. He writes to the editor that he is thoroughly convinced of the advantages of advertising. He says he has received, in answer to the advertisement, 794 letters, 13 photographs, of ladies, 2 gold finger rings, 17 locks of hair, 1 copy of Ike Marvel's "Reveries of a Bachelor," 1 thimble, and 2 dozen shirt buttons. He ought to be convinced.