MR MUZZLE AT THE BAZAAR.

Hawke's Bay Times, Volume 13, Issue 662, 8 March 1869, Page 2

MR MUZZLE AT THE BAZAAR.

To the Editor of the Haivke's Bay Times.

Sir, —Sins my furst lether I have had the loan of two Dictionary's lent me to look out the hard words etsetterer. Mr Websters and Mr Evervbodvs.

I shant say who indeuced me to go to the Bazaar out of a chrustyan feelin —But when I ad payd my tanner what with the lights cornpenny and rnoosik I knowd I was narvous, cos I didnt no wat to do with my ands, whether T shoud hold em afore or behind me, or put em in my pockets or stick my thumbs in my weskit Howsomdever a young leddy comes up to me and ses Heres a lether for you by the post and sixpence to pay. Mistake, Miss, ses I-—I aint got no furrin correspondents. Wats your name ses she—Muzzle ses I—Xactly ses she its for you. So I payd the tanner and goes up in a corner to see wat it wur, tho I had my misgivin it wur a bill. Wat shoud it be but a poechical effusion about love and dove—l looks at the kiver and on it was rit Herr Von Winkle, and underneath it Morkeyhausen. Then I noed it was a mistake or a piece of gammon, or else she had took a fancy to me, but I shan't say no more about that just now.

I thort as there was such a lot of) purty things, chiefly horneymental, I must buy sun-thin, so I goes up, to one of the young shopwomen and

axes how much is that ere cutty p}» !Miss? Eighteenpence ses she, so .took the pipe (strawnory thing foj young ooman to sell, cos they ft courages smoking) and forks outai a crown and waits there a hit -, [think youve furgot my change Mis ses I, kwite pearllite—Oh we doi i give change at Bazaars ses she. The o-av me some baccy instead ses Dont sell it ses she—Then some the chaps larfed andsed I wur swi died.

Up comes another young creety and ses will you put into the lucb bag ? What shall I put in ses Guv me a shilling, and put your am into this bag and pull out sumthi] ses she. So I tips the bob and pul] out a top wich was wery like one c them Mr Moses wants 1,000 boj to spin, tho I don't know where a! them voungsters is to come from.

The Christmas tree was wery purt] with all them toys a danglin, am makin belief to grown on the end of the bows. So when the boys am gurls wur a spekalatin I took a mini ber too. I gets a little boy wit] wings but not a stich of cloths on, so I axes one of the gents wat had cum of them, and he ses he nevei had nun. ISTow even the mouri boy wears slrurts or shauls, so he miisl have bin wery badly hoff, or lived in a wery hot country. One of tbi little gurb ses to me Wat rime 9 tc Kewpid? Guv it up ses I—Whj Stewpid ses she, but I coudntseethi wit of ifc.

About ten oclock I was turning to kwit, when I haccidentally stum bles agin a young fellar and nearlj nox him over. Your no gent ses he No ses I and dont wish to be will theres good wurk to be done in NeV Zealand therey so many pretenshioru forcheries its my opinion the bisness it overdun and dont pay. Muzzle.