Amusing and Instructive.

Hawke's Bay Times, Volume 7, Issue 359, 19 March 1866, Page 1

Amusing and Instructive.

The Model Lady puts her children out to nurse, aud tends lupdogs ; lias in bed till noon ; —wears paper-soled shoes, and pinches her waist; -—gives the piano fits, and forgets to pay her milliner ; —cuts her poor relations, aud goes to church when she has a new bonnet; —turns the cold shoulder to her husband, and flirts with his “ friend ” ; —never saw a thimble ; —don’t know a darningneedle from a crow-bar; —wonders where puddings grow ; —eats ham and eggs in private, and dines on a pigeon’s leg in public ;—runs mad after the last new fashions; —doats on Byron ; —adores any man who grins behind a moustache ; —and, when asked the ago of her youngest child, replies, ■ —“ Don’t know, indeed ; ask Betty !” —Fanny Fern.

A Nunr.Hotrs Pbogent. — In the village of Springfield, near Gretna Green, there resides a respectable old -woman, named Janet Colthart, or Johnston, who has lived to see her offspring in their fourth generation. Since Janet was dandled on her mother’s knee the world has seen some strange mutations. More than one kingdom has begun and ended, and distance has been annihilated by the steam-engine and electric telegraph. Janet had entered her teens before Bonaparte commenced to play his brilliant part in the world’s history, and ere Waterloo was fought she had well-nigh reached the middle of life’s journey. Though now many years past the allotted span of three score years and ten, she still retains possession of her faculties, and enjoys good health. She has, as we have said, been spared to see her and her children’s children unto the fourth generation. She is mother to ten, grandmother to forty-nine, great-grandmother to forty, and great-great-grand-mother to one, making in all the very respectable number of 100.—Peebles Advertiser.

A Disease among the Cats. — A disease has been prevalent in Forres for several weeks among the feline species, which has cut them off in every direction. The animals appear to be disinclined for food for a day or two, then they have running of water at the mouth and nose, dull bleared eyes, and great prostration of strength. They lounge about the earth or in by-corners, and do not touch food of any kind for days. They generally die on the eighth or ninth day.—Forres Gazette.

“Flowers that Never Die.” —Sir Bernard Burke, in his “ Vicissitudes of Families,” gives us a roost touching instance of the love of flowers to linger upon the spots where-they were once tenderly nurtured. “ Being in search,” he tells us, of a pedigree with reference to the Findernes, once a great family seat in Derbyshire, I sought for their ancient hall. Not a stone remained to tell where it stood- I entered the church ; not a single record of a Finderne was there! I accosted a villager, hoping to glean some stray traditions of the Findernes. ‘ Findernes S’ he said, *we have no Findernes here, but we have something that once belonged to them; we have Fiudernes’ flowers.’ * Show me them,’ I replied, and the old man led mo into a field which still retained faint traces of terrace and foundation. ‘There,’ said he, pointing to a bank of garden flowers growing wild,‘these are Findernes’flowers, brought by Sir Geoffrey from the Holy Land, and do what w» will they will never di«,”