Basis Of Successful Marriage Is Respect Sufficient? Use Of Cosmetics

Hawke's Bay Herald-Tribune, Volume 81, Issue 28, 27 October 1937, Page 11

Basis Of Successful Marriage Is Respect Sufficient? Use Of Cosmetics

rV CONTROVERSY has been raging in American newspapers as to whether respect is a sufficient basis for marriage. So much interest has been taken in the -subject that discussions are extending into their seventh nionth. Sydney people have also been interested. Some are all in favour of love; others are all for respect; while still others believe in 'a blending of both. Here are spme of their opinions:— MRS. P. A. CAMERON (president of - the Feminist Club): Marriage is impos- ■ sible without respect. I don't tbihk a person, however, could marry without love. You need both. LADY WALDER: There shouM be love, but you cannot have love without a certain amount of respect. In my opinion anyone would be f oolish to marry without .love.' But I would not say a successful marriage would be impossible, based on respect alone. * MTRS ZELDA REED (visitor from Reno, U.S.A.): From my experience in Reno, I think marriage can be based on one thing only— genuine love. I think many people live their married lives without knowing this; they do not realise that they have missed the most important thihg. A lot of marriages that are called successful are hased only on respect, yet how much is missing ! MRS. T. McVITTIE (wife of the Rev. T. McVittie, Presbyterian Minister): Respect is absolutely necessary in a successful marriage, but it is not sufficient. One might have the highest respect %r a - person, yet feel that marriage with that one would be unthinkable. Love, and love only, is the basis of all happy marriages. To marry someone you do not lcrve, however estimable that person might be, is to court disaster. A might eommand the respect of the whole community. because of Ms ability and outstanding qualities and still • not have those traits of character that a happy marriage requires. There i^ perhaps, a glamour surrounding people of means and position when marriage is in question, but where there is not love there cannot be happiness."

MRS. HAROLD SCHWARTZKOFF (recent bride): Respect should be based on love, but I think good companionship counts for a. tremendous amount. Lots of things are more important than money, but it is nice.ta know. that after your marriage you will go to a lovely home. To have interests in common is one of the biggest factors.

MISS KAY PARKER (daughter of Mr. and Mrs. O. H. Parker, of Croydon, matron of the Yass Hospital, and the youngest matron at the fifth annual conference of hospital matrons and auxiliaries) : Respect is not enough. • Often very difficult circumstances have to be overcome, and without love this would not be possible. Without true love there can be no contented marriage. MATRON DE MERRALL: Respect takes precedence over money or anything else in the world. Respect, allied with mutual understanding, is the foundation for a sound married life. MRS. FLORENCE TAYLOR Cpresident of the Arts Club): Respect itself is too cold. Love is absolutely essential in married life. If love is there, it does not arartter whether a person is plain or

Of course, it is always nice to have a large banking account, hut this is secondary. MADAME PAO (American wife of the Chinese Consul-General): Respect? Well, of course, it must come first, but it is not sufficient. Love and understanding are also necessary. According .to the nationality of the person you marry, you must adapt your life. You must know something. of that person's country and the customs of the country, and you must have an appre-' ciation of its citipns, if you are to enjoy a successful married life. CANON J. S. NEEDHtAM: Respect? No, that's not what I got married on. I don't think that in ,all my experience of giving advice to young couples I have ever asked that question. I would not dream of giving an answer to a hypothetical problem of sueh a nattire. I would have to know the individuals and their stability of character. LADY SNOWDEN: In addition to respect, one must have the wherewithal to live and to provide for the future as well as is possible in these trpublous times. MISS MOT.T.1E THORPE (inter-state liockey player): Respect is not enough. I think you need a lot of money, too. You don't need love. It doesn't last,-but money and respect do. MRS. MOORE COSGRAVE: Yes, I think respect would be sufficient, but only for the mature-minded adqlt. A mind which is too juvenile cannot see around the compass. If a man loves a woman who respects liim, love will follow. Respect can be a stepping stone to love. Personally, I could marry on respect, but a man would need to be full of ideals and capable of living up to those ideals. He must have ambition, and not be content to let things take their course. Money would enter into it, for one could not respect a man who could not provide reasonable cornfort for his wife.