FLASHES.

Gisborne Standard and Cook County Gazette, Volume I, Issue 22, 2 August 1887, Page 2

FLASHES.

To-night at McFarlane’s the first act of the political drama will be played with Mr Locke as the star. Harbor Board meet to-night at the usual time. A lively meeting is expected. “For Major Atkinson to preach economy is like nothing but Satan reproving sin.”—Dunedin Herald. Mr Thomas Bracken (Paddy Murphy) was tendered a complimentary benefit last week by his Dunedin friends. Things are looking up in Palmerston North, A contemporary says that marriages are the order of the day, and the clergy will have plenty to do in this line before long I The first steamer of Messrs Tysers’, the Balmoral Castle, has left London for New Zealand. A London telegram says that sugar "is j—iiuiug. ■ ou uis in Gisborne—to the bottom of a whisky glass. Mr Montgomery, late M.H.R. for Akaroa, has gone for a trip to England. Henry George; “ Come and join our Anti, poverty Society.” Workingman: "Glad to do it. Just count me in.” Working man : “ I have no dollar." Henry George: '• Then move on. This feliew behind you has money, We are not running a free show."—Omaha Bee.

A great deal of distress has been caused by the recent Greymouth floods. The subscriptions, however, to the relief fund are rolling in well. Napier is said to be pretty full of Maoris, who have rented all the cheap empty houses, in view of the approaching three months’ sitting of the Land Court. Two billiard rooms have been let to speculative natives at 610 and £7 per week respectively. A branch of the New Zealand Medical Association has been formed in the Hawke's Bay capital. Travelling quacks please take note of this. Beats the record, A torpedo boat built by a London firm for the Italian Government has made a trial trip at 29 miles an hour. One of the Italian cruisers does 22J miles an hour. The editor feels lone and miserable when

he finds no joke that's soissorable. The races for the American Yachting Club for which the English boat the Thistle is much fancied, comes off on Sept, 27 and 29. Said Rev Mr Lewis at Christchurch the other day on the duties of an elector; " What was wanted in Parliament was men of good moral character and let it not be said that the Wellington brothels reaped a harvest during a session of Parliament." The author of " Home, sweet Home " never had a home and George Macdonald, who has eleven children, is the author of " Annals of a quiet Neighbourhood." A newspaper up North acknowledges the receipt of fourpenoe—the third and final dividend in a bankrupt estate. The sum which they actually received however, was only two pence, as it cost two pence for a stamp to send it I It is proposed by the friends of the late Mr Randolph Caldecott to place a memorial tablet to his memory in the crypt ot St. Paul’s, besides the monument of George Crinkshanks. The Nelson Colonist editor must indeed be hard up for copy when he publishes 42 inches in small type of a Jubilee ode. To give an idea of the “ slush ” here is a sample verse:— Tue seething noise, propulsive, scares The sportive Naiads from their lairs ; In haste they swim east, west, north, and south,

And beg 2Eolus ope his mouth. A London paper says that Mr G. A. Sala has transferred his “ Echoes of the Week,” of world-wide fame, from the Illustrated London News to the Entertainment Gazette, a bright and comprehensive guide to, and notice of, the various shows in town.

Special settlements are to be formed in the newly acquired Waimarino Block, along the line of the Northern Trunk Line. The land is said to vary in quality, some of it being exceptionally good. Te Kooti is now in the Waikato. The local hotelkeepers have laid in a new stock of 50 red rum and colonial swipes in anticipation of the warrior’s visit.

There is at Carrick, Tasmania, a man aged 114 years. And yet, according to a Launceston paper, he has never been a teetotaller. Sir William Fox would be horrified at the fact

“ Young men believe in nothing now-a-days," says Mrs Ramsbotham with a deep sigh. “ Why, there’s my nephew Tom, who was brought up as a Christian, and now he’s an acrostic.”

The German language is to be made the language of instruction in the High Schools of the Baltic provinces. A poor man who less than one year ago had only one suit of clothes, went into the newspaper business and now has eight suits. Seven of them are for libel.

The celebrated ruby mines of Burmah have been leased to Mr Streeter, the eminent London jeweller, for a term of years. A big price was paid.

Phrenology is a fraud. Look at a man’s trousers. If they bag at the pockets, he has money; if they bag at the knees, he has brains,—Burlington Free Press.