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Grey River Argus, Volume XII, Issue 1071, 3 January 1872, Page 4

Eve had apme advantage 'that no other married wonlkn feVerenjoyedrchief a'mbrig which waß the fact that her husband could never lacerate her heart by telling ' howl his mother used to cook.' „A .correspondent. correspondent who has.read much aboutj[ wofeeri' as ' ' ejhereair^creatuws," Wantß : s6raeDo*o'.y to throw"a lively'girlover his shoulders and attempt to elope with her. He adds : " You ; will think; that she is made of pig iron. It would take at least three men to elope with one girl if she waSjtfTdckiot.^ ~ A man '" down 'East" was living with his second wife. One day , she asked him where he wished to be buried 1 when tie died. He replied, "In L— , where my wife was buried.?- : " And where would you liury riio if I should die?" said wife No. 2. "1^ LU,I of .course,". r said the husband. ", I won't. go a step,"- was the reply, <{ I 'don't know a soul up there, and I know, lots ty this fflfivqijard /" As an evidence of German profanity, it is stated, upon unquestionable authority, that General Von Molke was born in Mecklenburg Schweriri. What a wicked infant he must nave been, to be sure. The following quaint inscription is placed high «p on the Berlin Town Hall, in anticipation of the coming- illumiriatioiisj—"Peace brings wealth; wealth brings pride ; pride brings war; war ; brings poverty • poverty 'brings humilty ; ! humility bringtr peace."" • A lady replying recently to an advertisement proposing to send : / '; correct likeness of yourself arid your 'fortune told," enclosing the number of stamps, received in answer a looking-glass, oancl was informed that she could tell her owri'fbrtune by, counting her money. Aiy6ung lady With' a pretty-foot, but a rather large ankle} went into San Fraciscp; shoe store to be measured. The admiring clerk, who is of Gallic extraction, complimented her in, tHe following' queer way : "Mad-am, you have one bootiful foot, but ze leg commence too immediately !" An Indian girl ; who .:.feß,ltf f love with a fellow, rode twenty \miles with ajevolver in her hand, to • where a' ctfap-was chopping in the woods, and; told ihim if he didn't marry her she would! make a tunnel through him. The wedding came off that afternoon. He said he never would quarrel with a woman about a little thing like that. Visionary fruit— the apple of the eye.The Pacific mails— quiet husbands. A bird of oil omen—a swallow of brandy. To^|da*-c0 a Venetian bliiM— but :out his; eyes. " long and successful reign— the deluge. The wife's secret— her opinion to her husband.: A coquette; ig said to be a perfect incarnation of Cupid, because she keeps her beau in a quiver. A fourteen year old girl in Cincinnati cowhided a young loafer who had ,'made Jretnarksf about her. A lazy chap* has found out 1 that working between meals is unhealthy fozfjhimi 'A, barber, jwho was sued by a yofng man for cuttingr oft 1 his moustache, puf in tn© pKa tMMM't m it. '