CALIFORNIAN NEWSPAPERS.

Grey River Argus, Volume IX, Issue 712, 11 August 1870, Page 4

CALIFORNIAN NEWSPAPERS.

The papers published in San Francisco are large and numerous. The most recently started one^ The News of tJie World, a closely printed paper of eight pages, is an off-shoot of the San Francisco Bulletin, which, besides this, publishes a morning and evening paper suitable to the large population of the wide district over which it extends. This News of the, World is a remarkable production in newspapers. It contains about a dozen columns of telegraphic intelligence from all parts of the world, and the copy sent to us was printed only one hour before the dispatch of the Wonga Wonga for New Zealand and Australia, and had cable telegrams up to an hour or two before that. From east and west, from all parts of the United States, from all parts of Europe, and from British India, telegrams to the latest date are published From north and south, from China and Japan, from Valparaiso, and all down the southward coast,- by the many lines of fine steamers, which make San Francisco a central port of call, intelligence of the latest kind finds expression in this newspaper, which, with its evening and morning arid weekly confreres, makes up a set of well-selected and vigorous journals. For originality of manner and design, for a novel style of nomenclature, and a new system of plain speaking, perhaps the San Francisco News Letter has not a rival. Its "religious" views are so peculiar that most people would prefix a syllable to the adjective which would completely negative the idea. We quote a few extraordinary specimens betaw, illustrative of these peculiar, views. -Regarding a fellow-editor who gushes about . the ladies who adorned a' room in which said editor was " presentationed," the News Letter, quoting a high-flown sentence, declares it is difficult to say whether the writer " is a journalist, a juggler, or a jackass." Another editor is, termed "the peerless puddinghead of the Monitor." A "difficulty" between two other journalists is mentioned, result — "the clothes of the editor of the are to let/ A few editorial amenities , are extracted below. Its paragraph advertise- { ments are remarkable. A spectaclemaker is thus noticed, "Oh, say, have you seen in the dawn's early light?" — "Yes, like a cat through So-and-So's Brazilian pebble spectacles?" Somebody's whisky is paragraphed as " mild as mother's milk, sweeter than honey, and stronger than a Hoi." Of a large firm dealing in jewellery and silver ware, after a flowing narrative, it is said, "they have our prayers, if they can stand these

they can stand anything !" — and that, doubtless, is true. We reaervo some telegraphic dottings for some future occasion. Here is a sample of these dottings : "Performing young lady eaten by performing lions at New York. — Encore .'" The following are general extracts selected at random ; and certainly as it seems to us the San Francisco News Letter is perhaps " one of the most remarkable papers of the country": — The Alta says the Cliff House-road is " the wonder of all visitors, whether from the Orient or the Occident." To save a wonder-seeking universe the expense of coming to California to exercise its amazement upon this tremendous work, we may explain that the Cliff House-road is constructed of dirt, runs between rippling' sand hills for a distance of three or four i miles, and has a gin-mill at either terminus. A line of mud waggons runs the entire length without change of horses, conveying in perfect safety the editors of the Alta, and other dunces, at two bits per blockhead. • A reporter of the Chronicle says a piece of yellow cedar has been placed on his table, which emits a strong aiomatic odor, offensive to vermin. Mark the forgiving spirit "of a meek journalist : instead of wreaking a dire vengeance upon that offensive timber he gave it a flattering notice ! The Occident says : — "Then? is a little flock of the Presbyterian fold in Amador city, who earnestly desire a shepherd of their own order to lead them into the green pastures and beside the still waters." How we should rejoice to lead that little flock into the greeu pastures — how we I yearn to conduct them beside the still waters ! And how we should delight to chuck them in and hold their noses under ! What's the salary ? The Bulletin tells of a man " whose singular demeanor attracted the attention of his fellow lodgers,'/ and immediately adds, " his conduct was aljvays cdrrect, and he was uniformly courteous and obliging." It is pleasant to learn that he finally committed suicide— this uniformly courteous and obliging freak of nature. The Alta complains that the Examiner finds fault with it while appropriating its ideas, and concludes with the remark that it is not usual to look a gift horse in the mouth. True; but there is nothing ungrateful in criticising the snags exposed by the bray of a superannuated ass. A provincial paper, criticising a concert, says of a gentleman who attempted to sing : " Absence of voice and unacquaintance with music are bad enough ; but when to these is added a forgetf ulness of words, the thing becomes almost unbearable." What a lively performance it must have been ! A commodious steamer has been built to navigate the waters of the Great Salt Lake. She's expected to do a large freight business as soon as it shall be determined vrhit there is for her to carry, whither she shall take it, and why. In Kogue River Valley there is more religious interest than in the past few years. — Exchange. [Ah ! that locality is beginning to justify its name.] A widow, who has followed successfully three husbands to the grave, entered a well-known jewellery establishment in this -city last Saturday, and, producing the three silver plates which had once adorned the coffins of the dear departed, desired the astonished proprietor to have them " made over in a butter-knife." • • We note a v good deal of anxiety upon the part of v the people to be informed of the questions likely to be put by the Census Marshalls, that they may be prepared beforehand with intelligent falsehoods in reply. The following are the most important interrogations that may be expected : — What is your name ? How do you know? Who is your reputed father 1 What is your alleged age ? Do you prefer it plain, or with 'sugar and lemon ? What are your views regarding the Richardson-M'Farland matter? Is that your child ? Sure about that ? How often have you been shot 1 What were the names of the women ? Do you ever feel tempted to cheat more than is good for your health ? How do you brace up your constitution afterward ? What form of religion do you find the best disguise ? Explain your wife's antipathy to handsome servant girls. Where do you keep your silver plate? Isn't it near dinnertime ? Outch ! what have I done ? A contributor to a weekly writes as follows : — "W«re a harp of woe strung, to notes of such intense sadness as to fitly represent the wretchedness caused by intemperance, I should expect that, as this harp was struck, and uttered forth its notes of misery, the universe would be moved with sympathy and sorrow. 1 should expect that the sun, moon, and stars would weep tears of blood, and the sky put on the pall of mourning, and the earth utter a groan, deep, long and sorrowful, and all nature close in with a chorus of intense wretchedness and misery." . The pressure of colic necessary to the production of that paragraph could not have been less than fifty pounds to the square inch. It is a pleasing evidence that bounteous summer is already disbursing hospitable largess of gre'en cucumbers. The Rev. Horace Cook, who recently abducted a young girl, and then feigned insanity to save his broad back from the paternal cowhide, has become poor and penitent, and the methodists are generously begging money from sinners to set him up in business. We feel a consuming desire to contribute pelf to his fund, and the parson who shall first bring round the plate may esteem himself a fortunate man. He should not : permit himself to be disconcerted by the . vision of a shotgun thrust into his benevolent face, and the phantom of bull pump champigning against his heel; these are but the ordinary adjuncts of a newspaper office, and possess no kind of significance. The following is among the strongest of the News Letters productions which we have lighted upon :— "An obscure scribbler in England has apparently been hired by interested parties to whitewash the memory of the Patriarch David, and has earned his money by producing a biography of that old reprobate calculated t(> delude the young aud inexperienced into the belief that he was a model ? of T morality, a paragon of piety, and a bright and shining agglomeration of assorted virtues. To characterise this book as a literary fraud would be weak ; it is an audacions swindle — an insult to the intelligence of the age, and a premediatated attempt to corrupt the sources of knowledge. We do not hesitate to avow our unalterable belief that in the hide of King David was bound up a more complete stock of general meanness

than can be traced in the lives of any score of scoundrels in all antiquity. A convicted swindler, a shameless adulterer, a detected murderer and an arrant coward, this wretch who, had he lived in San Francisco, would have been hanged to a lamp-post, has managed to get himself into history as a clean-souled old gentleman of immaculate life and ability of no common order. And now justas his claims upon our admiration are beginning to be seriously disputed, his relatives commence publishing cards in the newspapers, justifying his atrocities, and excusing his contemporaries for permitting him to exist. We are told he was a man after God's own heart. If this be so, we have only to remark that tastes differ. We're fatigued of Dave.