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Grey River Argus, Volume IX, Issue 656, 2 April 1870, Page 4

1 ' You seem to walk more erect than usual, my friend."— Yes, 1 have been straightened by circumstances." A modem tourist calls the Niagara river " the pride of rivers." That pride certainly has a tremendous fall. There is a purple half to the grap<v a mellow half to the peach, a sunny half to the globe, and a better half to man. A young lady was seen to go into a pawnbroker's the other day to pledge her troth. — N.B. She is engaged to the assistant. A Georgia barkeeper advertises whiskey that will uiake one drunk, and a cordial that will restore his senses in a moment. Why m as Pharaoh's daughter like a billdiscounter ?— Because she got a little prophet (profit) out of the rushes on the banks. In marriage, the heart of a widow is like a furnished apartment, where one is apt to find something left there by a former lodger. A young Califoruian went to sleep, leaving his candle in the bung-hole of a powder keg. He was picked up iv the morning all over the house. An opened letter at the dead letter office read as follows :— " Seven years is raether long to kort a gal ; but ile hay you yet, Kate." Men are frequently like tea— the real strength and goodness is not properly drawn ut of them till tl ey have bet 11 for a short ime in hot water. , r