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For gossip of the most entertaining character, read the diary of Henry Crabbe Robinson, lately published. Many of these anecdotes would, and probably will, serve as aids to a new jest book. Joe Miller, himself, might be the author of the following :—Curran, who was Master of the Rolls in Ireland, in 1811, tells a characteristic anecdote of a member of the Irish Parliament. Boasting of his attachment to the jury system, " Mr Speaker," said he, "with a trial by jury I have lived, and by blessing of God, with the trial of jury I will die !" " What !" said Curran in a stage- whisper, "do you mean to be hanged Jack ?" While the Convention tha* nominated Abraham Lincoln for the second term was sitting at Baltimore in July, 18(54, a Western Orator of Irish extraction related a story of a patriotic old lady at Cincinnati, who had seven sons killed in the bloody battles of the North. The Mayor and corporation of the city sent a deputation to condole with the good woman on her great loss. " Never miud me, gentlemen," said the old lady ; " I only wish I had known when I was a younger woman that this war was coming, and [ would have had seventeen sons instead of seven to fight the battles of the Union." A Californian lawyer recently after stating a proposition, said .-—"May it please your Honour, I'll bet 100 dollars, and stake the money, that what E say is good law." The attorney and the other side declined to bet, and the argument was admitted by the Court to be unanswerable. Tall shooting. — A gentleman remarked in a tavern that he had shot a hawk at ninety y.irds with N>. 6 shot ; another replied : "Must have a good gun, but Uncle Da\e here has one that beats it. " ' • Ah, " said the first, how far will it kill a hawk with a No. 6 shot ?" •• I don't use shot or ball either," answered Uncle Dave himself. " Then what do you use, Uncle Dave ?" " I shoot salt altogether. I kill my game so far with my gun that the game would spile before I could get it." .:.-..■ What is that which no one wishes to have, yet when he has it, would be very sorry to lose it ? — A bald head.

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https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/newspapers/GRA18691113.2.22

Bibliographic details

Grey River Argus, Volume VIII, Issue 597, 13 November 1869, Page 4

Word Count
385

Untitled Grey River Argus, Volume VIII, Issue 597, 13 November 1869, Page 4

Untitled Grey River Argus, Volume VIII, Issue 597, 13 November 1869, Page 4

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