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Grey River Argus, Volume VIII, Issue 569, 9 September 1869, Page 4

A pedant remarked to a farmer, "I cannot bear a fool." •• Your mother could,' was the reply. During the first battle of Bull Run a bri-gadier-general discovered a soldier concealed in a hole in the ground, and ordered him to join his regiment. The man, looking hiro full in the face, placed his thumb upon his nose, and replied, " No you don't, old fellow; you want this hole yourself." " I didn't care to tell you, husband, before we were married, that my teeth are false." " L could get along well euough with you, wife, if j oar teeth were the only false thing yon carry in your mouth." Law books in Kentucky do not last long. In one county it is frequently found net essary to replace volumes worn out l»y the lawyers in wounding each other's heads. 11 What brought you to prison, my colond friend ? p " Two constables, Bah." " Yes ; but I mean had intemperance anything to do with it ?" " Yes, sah ; dey was bofeof 'em drunk." At a debating club, one evening, the question was discussed, whether there ismoru happiness in the possession or the pursuit of an object. "Mr President," said an orator, "'spose a beautiful gal was to offer me a kiss aud run away, and I was to run arter her, wouldn't I be happier when I cotchedher, than^vheu I was running arter her?" • - - .

POST OFFICE SAVINGS' BANKS. 1. Interest at the rate pf 5 per cent, per annum is given pn sums less than L2OO j as the rate of 4 per cent, per annum oiisiimt 1 over L 20 0; and in the same proportion for any shorter time on every complete LI deposited, provided that no interest t>P allowed on mqre than LSCO. 2. Depositors in the Post Office Sayings' Banks have direct Government security for the prompt repay naent of their money. ' 3. A depositor in any one of the Post Office Banks can continue his deposits at any other of such Banket, and can withdraw his money at that Pos{;Ofnce:£ank which is most convenient to him. . 4. The strictest secrecy is observed with 1 respect to, fhe names of depositors in Post Oflice Bangs, and the amounts of their de posits. 5. Married women may deposit money in the Post Osipe Savings' Bank, and money so deposited ">yill be repaid to, the depositor, unless her husband gives notipe, in writing, of marriage, and claims payment of tlie deposits. '" ■ 6. Money may be deposited by pr pn be half of minors. Depositors over seven years' of age are treated as persons of full age, but minors under seven years of age cannot withdraw their deposits until they have reached the age of seven. 7. Applications' to the Chief Office in each Province on the business of Post Office Savings' Banks, ajjd the replies sent thereto, are free from charge w oo?tage-