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Grey River Argus, Volume VII, Issue 498, 25 March 1869, Page 4

Who is the shortest man mentioned in the Bible ? — Knec-higlj-miah. First duty of the modern politician : To ruminate on the " spirit of the times." There is a good reason why a little man should never marry a bouncing widow. He .might be called " the widow's mite." Sigu ou a house in Syclehham :— "This cottage for sail to any one who can raise the wind." " A Frenchman having heard the word "press" made, use of to imply persuade— press that gentleman to take refreshments, press him to stay, &c. — thought- he would show his taleut by using, what he imagined, a synonymous term ; and he, therefore, made no scruple to cry out in company, " Pray, squeeze that lady to sing !" The first physician in a certain case was discharged by his patient because he was honest enough" to tell him he had only a sore throat, and the second doctor having had some hint of the fact, answered the sick man, when questioned, that his case was highly abnormal, and had. degenerated into synanche tonsilaris. "Why, only think, doctor, " said the patient, * • that fool told rne-I had nothing but a sore throat, and I told him I had no use for such a dunce." Judge of man by his actions, a poet by his eye, a knave by his leer, a player by his strut, an Irishman l>y his swagger, an Englishman by his rotundity, a Scotchmau by his shrug, a justice by hjjs f rowri, <a great man by Ins modesty, a tailor by his agility, and a woman by her neatness. •A gentleman. who had carefully trained up his servant in ijjie way he should go, so that when his wife was present he would not depart from it, sent him with a box ticket for . the Theatre to a young lady. The servunt returned when the gentleman aud his wife were at diuner. : He had, of course, been told, in giving answers to certain kinds of questions, to substitute the masculine for the feininiue pronoun in speaking of the lady. " 7>id you see hun?" said the gentleman, giving him the cue. "Yes, sir," replied the < servant; "he said he'd, wait for you, sir." j " What was he doing ?" asked his wife care- ! lessly. "He was putting on his bonnet," was the reply. •— v .- .~ ,