Mistress — 1 Forgot it Why, I told you to impreis it on your mind.’ Bridget— l It was on me moind I put it, mum, an’ me moind wint agthray wid it.’ ‘Ah, my friend,' said a clergyman to a parishioner who was the husband of a termagant, and who had made application for a divorce, ‘ we should be yielding and forgiving. There are no divorces in heaven.’ * That’s the reason,’ said the sufferer, • why I am so anxious to get a divorce here.’ Daniel Webster was once dining with a snobbish Bostonian, who had the ill-mannora to boast of the quality, age, and cost of his wines, be even went into a computation of the interest on the coat that had accrued since the parohase of the wine. Webster listened courteously, and when the computation was ended be hold oat hie glass to his host, and quietly remarked—“ Bet us atop that aoeumulation of interest.” A wicked boy got into a fight with his uncle, and biting off his nose swallowed it. He was brought before the Police Court, his nnole appearing against him. ‘ This is your nephew, is he,’ asked the magistrate. ‘I am sorry to say he is.’ 1 1 think I detect some resemblance,’ said the judge. ‘Yes,’ replied the uncle, mournfully, ‘he has my nose.’
FIDELITY COMPANY’S JS6QQO ON MELBOTTRHE CUP 128 NOMINATIONS. First ... ... ... ... ... £IOOO Second ... 400 Third 300 Other Starters (about £44 each) ... 1100 Non-Starters (about £2O each) ... 2000 And Forty-seven (Victorian Bonds (each £23 Ss) 1200 Total No. 175 £BOOO Each Programme Number carries a Double Interest—the first in the Nominations, the second In the Bonds. Programmes—£l each, and two 2d stamps. Cheques (with la exchange), to be payable only to a No. ——, or to Bearer. It otherwise drawn out will be returned. No Registered Letters or Telegrams, Address only to “ Fidelity Company,” care of Alfred A. Oanjeron’a Box, No. 251, Dunedin. 3043 GR A.TEFUL—COMFORTING. P P S' S 0 O C O A. BREAK PAST. “By a thorough knowledge o' the natural laws which govern the operations of digestion and nutrition, and by a careful application of the fine properties of wallselected cocoa, Mr Epps has provided our breakfast tables with a delicately-flavored beverage which may save us many heavy doctors’ bills. It la by the judicious use of such articles of diet that a constitution may be gradually built up until strong enough to resist every tendency to disease. Hundreds of subtle maladies are floating around ns ready to attack wherever there Is a weak Eolnt. We may escape many a fatal shaft y keeping ourselves well fortified with pure blood and a properly nourished frame.” —See article in the “Civil ServiceGaaotte,” Made simply with boiling water or milk. Sold only In packets, labelled : JAMBS EPPS & CO Homoeopathic Chemists, LONDON, Ako— EPPS’S CHOCOLATE ESSENCE, for Afternoon use, 2641
Permanent link to this item
https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/newspapers/GLOBE18820930.2.24.1
Bibliographic details
Globe, Volume XXIV, Issue 2647, 30 September 1882, Page 4
Word Count
477Page 4 Advertisements Column 1 Globe, Volume XXIV, Issue 2647, 30 September 1882, Page 4
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