Page 3 Advertisements Column 1

Globe, Volume XXIV, Issue 2477, 15 March 1882, Page 3

Germany hag solved a problem for us. In that country more girls marry at thirty-five than at nineteen. Now we all know why girls or thirty-five remain nineteen for so many years—they don’t want husbands. A little girl who had often heard her mother speak of her father, who wag quite bald, as being a self-made man, asked her one day if her father was a self-made man, why ho didn’t put more hair on hie head. ‘ Have some milk this morning ? asked the milkman of Torzer, who stood at the back door. ‘No, not this milk, gome udder milk,’ said the little one. And the milkman walked a chalk line away from the houge. • Men often jump at conolueions,' says the proverb. So do doge. We saw a dog jump at the conclugion of a cat, which was sticking through the opening of a partly cloeed door, and it made more disturbance than a church scandal. The Patriarchs Scene- Vestry of pariah church near Glasgow. Minister (addressing one of his elders) : ‘Well, Mr Thamson, what did you think of my sermon on the patriarchs this morning ?' Parmer Thompson : ‘ Weel, sir, I’ve jist been thinkin’ that the patriarchs had unco little in their fceids tao keep sae mony cuddies and nannie-goats. D'ye no think it wid a been better for them tae hao guid Ayrshire kye, and sent in their mulk tae Qleeca ?’ Collapse of minuter.