THE EDITOR’S VISITOR.

Globe, Volume XXII, Issue 2040, 7 September 1880, Page 3

THE EDITOR’S VISITOR.

He entered the country editor’s den with the air of a man of leisure, and desired to sea the proprietor. That individual looked up from the leader upon which he was engaged, and remarked that he was very busy, but could talk for a few minutes. “ Well,” began the visitor, rather drily, “ I just thought I’d drop in on business. You may not be aware of the fact that I have for sale the very best suspenders to be found anywhere. They have shoulder braces attached, and are pronounced perfect by eminent professors of physical culture. They are called the ‘ Arizona,’ and don’t shed their colour in the hottest weather.” I am really very busy,” responded the editor, testily, “ and don’t “ And then,” broke in the suspender man, “ I have a fine assortment of neckwear and cuffs. It would do you good to see them. My cuffs are all made on an improved pattern, originated by myself, and they are cheap, too; only ten cents, a pair.” “ I can’t ” remarked the edjtor, in an ecstasy of despair, when the man of business again interrupted him by remarking—• “ And yon should just lay your eyes on my toilet soaps, in all their pristine sumptuousness. I have bear-grease, soap, and turtle oil, and also a beautifier made of the tissues of nightingales. The latter is a great favourite with the ladies. On each cake is inscribed the following:— This makes the maiden’s skin snow-white, And fills her bosom chaste with hope ; When used at morning and at night There’s nothing like Jones’ Bulbul Soap, ’Twill happy every damsel make For twenty-seven cents per cake.

“ Then I have shaving soap of a high order. Have you ever heard of my snapdragon shaving soap ? ” The editor, entirely out of patience, yelled at the top of his voice: “ I don’t want any brushes, hair grease, suspenders, cuffs, ice cream freezers, Huxley on crayfish, razors, fish hooks, pins, Shelley’s poems, velocipedes, pruning shears, or anything else. lam busy, and have no time to throw away on canvassers ! ”

“I am no canvasser,” responded the other turning red in the face. “You are not ? ”

“No, I am not! ” “Then,” continued the editor, with a dumbfounded air, “ why do you come here eulogising your wares ? 11 “ To give you an idea, and get your views on advertising.” “ Do you want to advertise ? ” inquired the editor, his eyes glistening like dew glints in the morning sun. “ I do, sir.” Then the editor took his order, told him he had lots of time, showed him through the press room, took him out to luncheon, and invited him to call at his house and be introduced to the family ; after which they parted as sentimentally as an engaged couple when one is going abroad to spend the summer.