THE LOAFER IN THE STREET.

Globe, Volume XXII, Issue 1950, 25 May 1880, Page 3

THE LOAFER IN THE STREET.

I came reoently, in the pages of your morning contemporary, across a very interesting article entitled " What Shall We Do With Our Butter ?" The writer oalls attention to a new process for preserving that oleaginous compound, and suggests that farmers should experiment in the business with a view of increasing their export trade in this direction. It's a good idea. "Is it worth while?" asks the writer. Oh, I truly think so. " Will it pay?" he goes on to ask. I devoutly trust it will. If I may be allowed to express my opinion on WHAT SHALL WE DO WITH OUR BUTTER ?

I should say ship as much as possible to foreign climes, for, between ourselves, there's prooious little made worth eating here at the present time. I wish Messrs Maling and Co. all success. " Challenge—l hereby challenge the Ministers' Association of Ohristohurch, collectively and severally, and especially the Revs. Messrs Elmslio, Reid, Macfarlane, Smalley and Crewes, to a public discussion of the dogma of " Eternal Suffering," including the fiction of man's necessary immortality. And I undertake to prove said dogma to bo unreasonable, diabolical and blasphemous, and the most prolific source of infidelity.—B. Cass. " I believe Mr Cass has so far had no response to the above. This is much to be regretted. Mr Cass is a man of very original views on many subjeots, and the diecuasion he suggests would have been in many respects instructive and—perhaps amusing. We must only hope that Mr Cass may be ablo to evolve some other subject not of a polemical nature—to lecture on. The Debating Society might give a show. " Young gentleman, recently from England, wishes to get on to a Station. W.0.,' Australasian ' office." Do you know I feel for the above party. Like the proverbial young boar he has all his troubles before him, and like many of his sort he probably won't be long on the station before he will wish to get off_ again. There is a groat moral in the advertisement after all. No young gentleman, unless accompanied by monetary references, should come to this country now, if his idea of carrying out his share in the great scheme of colonisation, goes no further than " to get on to v. a station." He is likely enough to get into a station, but it will be one presided over by the minions of the law, and will be found unrecuperative as it were. So far as this colony is concerned, we are all gentlemen now, at least so I'm told; and as I observed last week the next generation will be all such highly educated swells, that really the more I think of it the more convinced I am that it will be by-and-bye probably the most priggish spot in the whole globe. I have on previous occasions noticed the obituary style of doing things in Honolulu, as evidenced by the columns of the local journal. As £ said before, I really think we might imitate the idea with advantage. What do you think of the beneath ?—" Hall—At his residence at Kainaliu, North Kona, Hawaii, March 19th. Chableb Hall, aged 69 years, a native of Virginia, U.S.A. He had resided on these Islands for over fifty years, having arrived here in 1829, as a seaman on board an American ship. He was a carpenter by trade, and soon got employment with the chiofs. He married the daughter of a small chief at Pahoehoe, North Kona, and after her death, he married Hannah, the daughter of the late Samuel Rice, Gov Kuakini's blacksmith, who survives him and by her he had a large family of children, seven of whom are now living. Up to an advanced age and until he was crippled by an accident, Mr Hall was ' a mighty hunter ' of wild cattle on the mountains of Hawaii, and could outwalk most men of half his years. He was a kind and affectionate husband and father and a good neighbour." A good tradesman, a mighty hunter, an affectionate husband and father, and a first-claBS neighbour. Why, no King could have a better epitaph! The last San Francisco mail brings the dreadful intelligence that " A conspiracy has been discovered to destroy the entire journalistic fraternity of Doadwood, Colorado. The first attempt made was an effort to assassinate George Stokes, of the 'Evening Presß,' by bravos hired for 50 dols. each by a well-known scoundrel." What kind of people must they be anyhow in Deadwood, Colorado ? and what a stupendous thought it is to suppose all the other cities of the world were to follow tho example of Deadwood! Such a calamity would put an end to everything, and plunge tho world into a cataclysmio abyss, so to speak, from which future recovery would be hopeless. The bravos, it seems, were paid about £l2 each to massacre the whole Press Association. Good gracious, the conspirators must have been flush of money to pay through the nose in that style. Some kind friend, with a view probably of increasing my interest in good works, has forwarded me a minute ledger. It is entitled "An Account Book of Expenditure for Religious and Benevolent Objects." The prefatory remarks state that it is not intended that the book should ever be produced in any public way, but simply used to enable each person to put the system into practical effect. Further on, I find it stated that "the very lowest proportion of our income, for whioh we can find any justification in giving to charitable objects is one-tenth of the whole." Now this strikes me as being a little too heavy interest. Take the case of a man earning £IOO a year who has a wife and ten kids (no really respectable colonist of any standing has under eight arrows in his quiver), I cannot quite see how he can keep doing business in this style, keep a roof over his head, and do justice to his family every Sunday in churoh. By this last I mean give the ten kids Id each for the plate, whioh with the usual 3d for the heads of the family comes to Is 4d a week, and nearly £3 10s extra a year. Unless considerable deductions for cash payments are made, I cannot see how the principle would work without tho man going a broker. However, I only speak according to my lights, and may be wrong. Some specimen [accounts are given in the book undor notice, in which suggestions are made as to the relative sums in which the "tenth" is to be apportioned. Thus—

Prom thia it may ba observed that the Building Fund gets several points the boat of it. Now in my ignorance I should have given the 4 bob to the Widow, and the 2s 6d to the Building Fund ; but we live and learn, and I shall know better for the future. I cannot but think, however, that the principle of the Systematic Giving Leger is good, but the interest charged by the Institution is a little too high tonod. Some few days ago the conversation turned, at an establishment (not at an hotel) whore most men meet upon equal terms, on the unsatisfactory salariea paid here to the ministers of the Church of England, and the difficulty, particularly in country parishes, of raising the stipend. A minister of that persuasion who happened to be present said he could |quite believe it, but a long experience of such matters had taught him one way out of the difficulty. " I always nominate," he said, "the parish butcher for my churchwarden, and arrange matters so that the storekeeper always more or less up oountry a reliable and weighty personage — shall be the parishioners' warden. These gentlemen ore naturally my principal creditors, and you see for their own interest they naturally see my stipend is paid regularly, and invariably advocate my little interests at vestry meetings." I have always thought the parable of the unjust steward contained a great moral, and without wishing to institute a comparison between that party and tho roverend gentleman whose exporiercss I have taken the liberty of quoting, I must confess I think the minister displayed considerable astuteness in a good cause, and I make a present of the idea to those similarly situated with a great deal of pleasure. ["Church News " please copy.] A vory recent obituary contained the notice of the death of "Tommy" Wills. Thore are many old Australians who will remember " old Tommy," and the following little anecdote in this connection, which has been kindly furnished by an old Australian cricketer, will, I have little doubt, be read with interest : T. W. Wills, or as he was best known "Tommy Wills," was a rare exponent of the game of cricket in its several departments—-

his resources at any critical juncture in a match were always clever, and sometimes unique. He was a good general in the field, and acted in the capacity of captain in many a well fought struggle in Victoria. His text seemed to be, "we must win, fairly if possible, but at any rate we mußt win," and this he exemplified on the occasion of a great match, the Victorian Eleven v Eighteen of County Bourker—Ho was skipper to the eleven and the late, George Marshall (also a fine cricketer of the old Bchool) acted in a similar capacity for the eighteen. The eleven appeared to be getting the best of the day until George was well set at the wickets and had made Lis half century. Tommy resumed the bowling, and the umpire—one of the right sort, who is still a warm supporter of the game, and may remember the incident—had to caution him early about the relation of his toe to the crease. Tommy protested, of course, "It was impossible—ho had not dragged his too, even a little bit, and the interruption waß simply to put him off his bowling. However, Mr Umpire, I will watch as well as you this time, and wo will see who's right," remarked the bowler. He took his usual short run, and sent in such a creamy one that Marshall's nimbus went flying. "No ball," yelled the umpire. "What!!" exclaimed Wills. " I'll swear I didn't touch the crease," "No, Tommy! quite right, my boy, you didn't, but you threw." And no one know better than himself what a deadly throw he had.

Dr. Set apart. b. Jan. 8th —To amount one week (being l-10th of income) ... 6 Jan. 15th—To do. do 6 d. 0 0 12 0 Cr. Expended. s. 3unday collections 3 Bible Society 2 Relief of Widow, Mra 2 Building fund 4 d. 0 6 6 0 12 0