SAMPSON JONES’ ASTONISHMENT.

Globe, Volume IX, Issue 1263, 5 April 1878, Page 3

SAMPSON JONES’ ASTONISHMENT.

Almost a New Year’s Story* Tite other afternoon f>ampson Jones, a boy of fourteen, was coming clown Larayette street, wondering if he would get a bowie--knife in his New Year’s stocking, when a young man of pleasing address encountered him and said—- ‘ B )b, do you want to earn a quarter ? ‘You’ve hit me dead-center—l do ! ’ replied Sampson. *• ‘Well, now, yon see that third houses on the right-hand side, don’t you?’ continued the young man. ‘ I see.’ * Well, I live there with my dear sister Amelia. We are all alone in this cold world, and though we love each other dearly we occasionally quarrel. We had a word or two this noon, and I left the house declaring that I would never return. I however got ashamed of myself in a short time, and I wrote this little note to her to evince my contriteness of spirit. If you’ll hand it in she’ll read it, forgive me, write an answer telling me that all is forgiven. And as soon as you return I’ll pay you and rush to her kisses of sisterly gladness. 5 * That’s a purty long story,’ said Sampson, ‘ hut if your sister don’t own a dog I think I’ll earn that quarter. ’ ‘Go up the front steps kind o’ softly, 5 cautioned the young man, and if our big fat hired girl opens the door, say to her that you want to see Amelia. Yon understand ? 5 ‘ I t-u-m, turn, b-l-e, bul, tumbul,’ and Sampson winked as he took the note and started off. j| He went up the stops softly, pulled the, bell the same way, and in about a minute a portly matron of forty opened the door, glared down on him, and asked—- ‘ What do you want around here ? ’ ‘ Put’n on a heap o’ dig, for a hired girl, aren’t you ? ’ ho snearingly answered, as he tried to look into the parlor. ‘ What! what’s that 1 ’ she exclaimed, as she seized his collar. See here, old gal, don’t try to put on any nickel-plate for my benefit. You kin deceive the kittles and spiders, ’cause they haia’fe traveled, but you don’t bang my hair —not for Joseph! ’ ‘ You unmitigated young villain—you impudent wretch—you —you ! ’ But she didn’t waste her strength in words. She sort o’ picked Sampson up, and sort o’ shook the breath of him, and dropped him l over the fence on the walk before he could figure that two eats at seven dollars each would cost fourteen dollars. As be got up, a young lady came running to the door and cr.ed out ‘ Mother ! mother ! what is it ? What’s the matter ? 1 ‘ Come hero, Amelia, till we catch him, again ! ’ answered the mother. Bat they couldn’t. Sampson got a.c- oss the street like a thirsty camel running for water, and as he turned and surveyed the house and the two females, and then looked down the street and saw th,o young man around the corner, he soliloquised— I 1 Dearest Amelia - darling brother—fat hired girl—-waiting to rush, and so on—l t a-i-k, taik, and Cd hove hot a hencoop to a cent that no living man could have put up that 'ere job on me. Lordy! hut didn’t that old lady cries cross all the ribs in my body by that one shake! ‘Our big fat hired girl 1 I s-e-e 1 5 My sister Amelia ’—l co n, CQiij R-t few, strew, constrow !'